AZ Snarry
by quixotic-hope
Summary: Repost. A compilation of oneshots, used to be songfics, in alphabetical order, each based on a different song. Overall R rating, thought most aren't that high. Each chapter has its own warnings, spoilers, ratings, etc.
1. As Long As You Love Me

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **n/a

**Spoilers: **all 6 books

**Song: **As Long As You Love Me

**Artist: **Backstreet Boys

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) backstreetboys (slash) aslongasyouloveme (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

"**xxx" signifies where the song lyrics would be located had they not had to be removed. **

Never in all his life had Harry regretted anything more than he regretted telling everyone that Severus Snape had killed Albus Dumbledore. He had been so sure that the man was a traitor, so sure that he had killed the old man out of hatred. After reviewing the pensieve that Dumbledore left him, however, Harry realized how much Severus had sacrificed. From that moment on, Harry made a vow to himself to do anything he could in order to protect Severus Snape.

_xxx_

One of the first things Harry did when Aurors captured Severus was to spread the word that the erstwhile Death Eater was innocent. No one believed him. They all said that he was insane. Some thought that Harry had turned dark. Others thought that Severus had put Harry under the Imperious Curse despite the fact that Harry had been able to throw off that curse since he was fourteen.

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xxx_

Rufus Scrimgeour was in charge of the case against Severus and wouldn't allow Dumbledore's pensieve to be viewed. He also refused to let Harry testify in Severus's favor, claiming that tests showed that Harry was suffering from a potion he ingested, and therefore his testimony wouldn't be accurate. Fuming, Harry tried everything in his power to get Severus let off. Nothing worked. Finally, Harry was left with no other option. He would have to sneak Severus out of Azkaban. __

xxx

After a few hours of planning, Harry was able to break into the prison and get Severus out. It wasn't hard to do considering that the dementors were no longer there. And considering how Harry had managed to fight Voldemort and his Death Eaters numerous times, this wasn't much of a challenge. Harry Apparated Severus to his small cabin in America that he had bought the year before. No one knew about it, so Harry felt they would be safe. __

xxx  


Over the next few months, Harry and Severus got to know each other better. Harry apologized profusely for not believing Severus, while Severus was grateful that Harry had finally realized his mistake. They formed a tentative friendship that neither one of them wanted to break. Severus had been attracted to Harry since before the Dumbledore incident, but had never said anything. He knew that such a beautiful creature wasn't meant to be with him.

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xxx_

Harry, on the other hand, found himself falling deeply in love with Severus. He would find himself gazing longingly at Severus for hours at a time. He was sure that Severus noticed something, but the older man hadn't said anything yet, so Harry decided to keep on staring.__

xxx

After a month or so, Harry began to notice that Severus gave him wistful looks as well. Harry paid close attention, and he was almost positive that Severus felt something for him as well. Deciding to risk it, Harry leant forward one night and brushed his lips against Severus's. He felt the older man stiffen, and Harry immediately started to lean backward, afraid that he had misread Severus's glances.

_xxx_

A moment later, though, Harry felt soft lips brush against his own. He opened his mouth for Severus and allowed the more skilled tongue to take over. Harry moaned as Severus's hands traced over every curve of his body. Upon breaking apart, Harry rested his head against Severus's and looked straight into the man's eyes. In them Harry saw love, lust, and a slight tint of uncertainty. Smiling, Harry gently kissed Severus's nose. Then he whispered against the older man's mouth, "Make love to me, Sev."

_  
xxx_

Later that night, Harry and Severus were curled up in Harry's bed. Severus had his arm draped protectively over Harry, pulling him close. Harry snuggled back into Severus and sighed happily. He felt safer than he had ever felt before. Lacing his fingers through Severus's, Harry brought the hand up to his lips and kissed it.

"I love you," Harry whispered.

Severus was silent for a moment, but then he pressed a kiss to the top of Harry's head and said, "I love you, too, Harry."

The two slept more peacefully than they had ever slept before.

**Please review and tell me what you think! **


	2. Breathing

**Rating**: R

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Hurt/comfort, Fluff

**Warnings**: Mpreg

**Spoilers**: books 1-5

**Summary**: Severus cheats on Harry with Lucius and winds up pregnant. Will Harry accept him and the baby, or will Severus's unfaithfulness tear them apart forever?

**Song**: Breathing

**Artist**: Yellowcard

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) yellowcard (slash) breathing (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_  
xxx _

Severus Snape tossed and turned, trying to get to sleep. It was no use. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't get to sleep. He felt the body next to him roll over. Harry was trying to curl up around him. Severus knew this and turned away, guilt filling his chest. __

xxx  


What had made him do it? Sure, Lucius had been his idol when he was in school, but that was years ago. Severus should have known not to risk his relationship with Harry for a one night stand with the former Slytherin. But Lucius had been so seductive, and before Severus knew what he was doing, he found himself being forcefully taken by the blond. While the experience was pleasurable, it wasn't as great as Severus had thought it would be.

Two weeks later Severus found out he was pregnant, and he wasn't sure if the father was Harry or Severus. He wanted with all his heart for it to be Harry's, but there was always the possibility that it was Lucius's. Severus smacked himself in the head. Why did he get himself into this?

_  
xxx_

The uncertainty was killing him. Severus needed to know which man had fathered his child before he decided what to do. The next morning while Harry was at work, Severus spent hours making a Paternity Potion. Thankfully he was a potions master because this potion was particularly difficult to make. After letting it sit for an hour, Severus poured it into a cup and swallowed it. After a moment, a faint silver light appeared in front of him, revealing a name. Severus felt his heart sink. The light spelled out "Lucius Malfoy."__

xxx

Knowing that he still had a few hours before Harry got home, Severus decided to talk to Lucius. He didn't really think that the man would want the child, but Severus still felt it was his duty to tell him. Sure enough, not a minute after Severus told Lucius about the child did Lucius start ranting about how he didn't want anything to do with Severus or the child. Lucius swore that if anyone ever found out who the second father was, Lucius would kill both the child and Severus. Severus didn't need telling twice. He left the house with a heavy heart. __

xxx

Severus waited a few days before talking to Harry. He had been more closed off than usual and decided that Harry finally deserved to know the truth. Taking a deep breath, Severus decided to just get it all over with at once.

"I'm pregnant with Lucius Malfoy's baby."

Harry stared at him for a moment, the shock in his eyes quickly replaced with hurt. Taking a shaky breath, Harry looked at the man he loved and tried to stop the tears from falling. Severus waited, unsure of what to do.

"Why wasn't I enough?"

Severus hadn't been prepared for that question. He had been prepared for the hurt and the anger, but not that question. How could he answer that? How could he tell Harry that he had ruined their relationship because the man who had filled his fantasies all throughout school had suddenly asked him for a friendly fuck?

Severus's lack of response caused Harry's tears to finally fall free. He couldn't do this right now. Not saying a word to Severus, Harry got up and left. All of his stuff was still in the house, but he didn't care. He just had to get away from Severus. __

xxx

That night Severus cried. He hadn't cried since his mother had died when he was thirteen, but how Severus felt like crying. He realized his mistake too late: he couldn't live without Harry. Feeling an incredible emotional breakdown wash over him, Severus decided he had had enough. Storming over to his bookshelf, he grabbed the nearest book and started flipping through the pages. Finally he found what he was looking for: the potion that would get rid of his unborn child.

Severus stayed up all night making the potion. He didn't really know why he was doing this. All he knew was that this baby had cost him his love, cost him his Harry. Severus wouldn't be able to deal with the constant reminder of how he had ruined his life. He couldn't do it.

It was nearly noon the next day when the potion was finished. Severus was about to drink it when he heard a knock on the door. Severus was tempted to drink the potion first, but since he didn't know the immediate side effects the potion might have, he decided against it. Cursing whoever was at the door, Severus flung it open, his mouth already open to jinx the person at the door. Instead, his jaw dropped open as the stared at his visitor in shock: Harry.

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xxx_

"Why are you here?" Severus asked breathlessly. He regretted the question when he saw Harry flinch. "Do you want to come in?"

Harry hesitated, then nodded. He followed Severus into what just last night had been his house. They both stood nervously in the entrance way.

"Are you moving in with Lucius?" asked Harry brokenly.

Severus nearly cried when he heard the defeated tone in Harry's voice. He quickly shook his head no. "I don't have anything to do with him anymore, Harry. I promise." Severus paused for a moment to collect himself. "I'm so sorry, Harry. I can't give you a good reason why I did what I did. I can only tell you how much I regret what I did. I'd take it all back if I could. You mean the world to me. Stay with me, and I'll make it up to you, I swear. Give me one more chance."

Harry looked into the pleading eyes of the man he loved. Severus had hurt him, but Harry still loved him. He didn't think he could ever stop loving Severus. Not wanting to answer yet, Harry looked around the room. His eyes fell on the potion Severus had been about to drink.

"What is that?" he asked. Severus followed his gaze and paled.

"I was planning on getting rid of the child," he said honestly. Harry looked stricken.

"You can't do that!" he protested. "The baby didn't do anything wrong! I won't let you kill it!"

"You have to be born before you can die," argued Severus. Harry scowled at him.

"You know damn well what I mean, Severus Snape. And if you think that I'll stay with a man that would just give up his child, you are sorely mistaken."

"Does that mean that you'll stay with me if I keep the baby?" asked Severus incredulously, hope beginning to gather.

Harry looked at Severus seriously. "Yes."

_  
xxx_

A little over eight months later found Harry and Severus in the hospital wing. Severus held the little pink bundle close to him. Harry leaned over to get a closer look at the little baby with jet-black hair and a slightly crooked nose.

"She's beautiful," Harry breathed, gently taking her from Severus. He rubbed his finger against her small cheek. "She looks just like you."

Harry placed a kiss to the baby's head before handing her back to Severus. Then Harry kissed Severus. Pulling back, he looked deep into the obsidian eyes and smiled.

"I love you."

"I love you, too," Severus whispered, kissing Harry again over their daughter's head. "I'll never hurt you again. I promise."

**Please tell me what you think!**


	3. Crawling Back to You

**Rating**: PG-13

**Warning**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a  
**Song: Crawling Back To You**

**Artist: Backstreet Boys**

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) backstreetboys (slash) crawlingbacktoyou (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

__

xxx  


As Severus Snape stood in the corner trying to avoid the glares being sent his way from every direction, he decided that Albus Dumbledore was a sadist. Why else would he have dragged Severus to the werewolf's stupid birthday party? After all, everyone hated him for breaking up with their beloved savoir. Nobody even stopped to think about his feelings. Nobody stopped to think that maybe Severus was just scared of rejection. Nobody stopped to think that maybe Severus really did love Harry, and that their breakup had affected him just as much as it had affected Harry. No. All that mattered to them was Harry, which explained why they all hated him and why Albus was a sadist for making him come.

_  
xxx  
_

As Severus was pouring himself a cup of pumpkin juice, he overheard Lupin talking.

"Harry decided not to come," he was saying.

"That's a shame," answered who Severus was almost positive was Tonks. "I haven't seen much of him lately. I was hoping to see him today."

"No one's seen much of him since the breakup," said Lupin, and Severus thought that he heard the wolf raise his voice a little. "He's pretty much locked himself in his apartment."

Severus told himself that he did not feel guilty in the slightest.

"He has an apartment?" asked Tonks. "I was wondering where he was staying."

"Yeah, he lives at 325 Diagon Avenue," said Lupin. There was no mistaking it this time: Lupin had raised his voice to make sure that Severus could hear him. Why? Did he want Severus to go talk to Harry?

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xxx  
_

Deciding that Lupin's words were an invitation to leave the party, Severus went in search of Harry's apartment. It didn't take him too long to find it. The building was gloomy-looking, not somewhere that he thought fit for Harry to live. Walking up the steps, Severus stood in front of the door and knocked.

"Go away, Severus," shouted Harry's voice. Severus started. He hadn't thought that Harry wouldn't let him in.

"Harry, please answer the door!" Severus begged. "I'm sorry that I sent you away! I was just scared. I've never felt this way about anyone before. Please let me in so we can discuss this!"

_  
xxx_

On the other side of the door, Harry was listening to every word that Severus said. He wanted to believe the older man so badly, but he didn't want to get hurt again. He had laid his heart on the line, and Severus had rejected him. But here Severus was putting his heart on the line. Could Harry really reject Severus? Was Severus sincere?

_  
xxx  
_

Hearing nothing from within the house, Severus stopped banging on the door. He dropped his hand, and his shoulders dropped dejectedly. Harry would never forgive him. He had totally fucked things up. Sighing, Severus brokenly whispered, "I love you, Harry." He turned around and had taken a few steps forward when the door was finally opened.

_xxx  
_

Harry remembered that last fight they had had. How Harry had told Severus that he loved him, and how Severus had ignored him. He remembered begging and pleading with Severus to tell him that he loved Harry as well, and how Severus couldn't say the words. Harry had left that night, thinking that Severus had only been using him.

But now Severus was finally declaring his love for Harry. He had apologized. Harry felt a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach, something that he hadn't felt since before he left. Hearing the dejected note in Severus's voice, Harry flung the door open.

_  
xxx_

Severus turned when he heard the door open. His chest tightened when he saw the dark circles under Harry's eyes. He looked like shit, but at the same time he looked perfect. Perfect because he was Harry, and he would always look beautiful to Severus. His eyes were sparkling, and Severus could only pray that they were sparkling because Harry finally believed him.

A second later Harry was walking towards him, a smile on his face. Harry wrapped his arms around Severus's neck and pressed his lips to Severus's in a gentle kiss. Severus pulled Harry closer to him and kissed him back. Harry sighed happily into the kiss. Then Harry pulled away enough to whisper, "I love you, too," against Severus's lips.

Severus smiled and kissed Harry again. Then he ran his hand gently down Harry's face, staring into the beautiful emerald eyes before him.

"Come on," he said. "Let's go home."

Harry smiled and followed Severus to their house. Neither noticed Remus, Tonks, and Dumbledore hiding behind the corner.

"See," whispered Remus, "I told you it would work."

**Yes, I know this is rather fluffy and OOC, but I like it anyway. Please review and tell me what you think. **


	4. Do or Die

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: After Harry gets injured during the Final Battle, only Severus seems interested. Will he be able to pull Harry back together?

**Song**: Do or Die

**Artist**: Papa Roach

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) paparoach (slash) doordie (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

He couldn't believe it. After months upon months of training to defeat the bastard, Harry Potter was stuck in a coma. Apparently he had used up too much of his energy in the battle. As Severus Snape looked down at the fragile body on the hospital bed, he felt his chest tighten. The young man deserved more than this.

_xxx_

Over the next few days, Severus spent all his time in his rooms. He wanted to be up in the hospital wing with Harry, but he was sure that once news spread about what had happened to the young hero, he would have fans surrounding him at every moment. Severus had no desire to be around dozens of adoring fans, so he stayed in his rooms. He missed his night time chats with Harry. During preparation for the war, the two had become good friends. Severus, of course, had found himself falling more and more in love with the Gryffindor, but he knew that Harry wasn't meant for him. That thought didn't help with his loneliness at all.

_xxx_

After about a week of hiding out in his rooms, Severus decided to brave the crowds and check on Harry. What he found shocked him. The only two occupants in the room were an unconscious-Harry Potter and a very tired-looking Poppy Pomfrey. There were no adoring fans. There weren't even any fretting Weasleys. Harry was all alone.

"I would have thought that there'd be someone else here," Severus said quietly as he walked over to the foot of Harry's bed. Poppy shook her head sadly.

"I would have thought so too, but that's not the case. No one seems to care about Harry anymore now that the war's over."

_xxx_

From that day on Severus spent all his time in the hospital wing. He never left Harry's side. Poppy had to yell at him every day or so to go back to his rooms and take a shower. She literally had to shove food into his mouth to get him to eat.

_xxx_

During the nights he spent alone with Harry in the hospital wing, Severus talked to the young wizard. Harry had saved his life so many times, and Severus told him as much. Looking down at the young man he loved more than anything, Severus started to cry. Gently rubbing his thumb over the back of Harry's hand, Severus leaned down and pressed his lips against Harry's forehead.

"Please come back to me," whispered Severus brokenly. "I can't live without you. I love you."

_xxx_

Two months later Harry moved. It wasn't much at first, just a simple twitch of the hand, but it soon became much more. Harry began to shift in his bed and groan. While he was overjoyed that Harry was showing signs of life, Severus knew that the time had come for him to leave. There was no saying that Harry would be pleased to see Severus when he woke up. He'd probably think that Severus was some old pervert or something for standing over him for so many weeks. So, ignoring Poppy's glare, Severus fled the hospital wing moments before Harry woke up.

_xxx_

The first thing Harry noticed when he woke up was that he was all alone. Yes, Poppy was there beside him, smiling and welcoming him back to the land of the living, but she was the nurse. It was her job to be there. Other than her, no one was there. Harry was almost sure that he had heard Severus talking to him, whispering words of love, but as Harry sat there in the cold hospital wing all by himself, he knew for sure that he was just dreaming. As if the man would want to be with him.

Poppy saw the dejected look appearing in Harry's eyes and decided to step up before things went too far. "How are you feeling, little one? You gave us quite a scare."

Deciding to ignore the word "us" in that sentence, Harry muttered, "Sorry. I feel fine. I actually feel better than I did before: more rested. What happened? Is Voldemort, I mean, did I..."

"Yes, Harry, you killed him," smiled Poppy, checking Harry over with his wand. He looked to be in perfect health. Perhaps all he had ever needed was a really long nap. The boy had looked so tired during the war.

"Is everyone, you know, all right?" he asked, not looking her in the eye.

"There were many casualties, but no one that you knew too well personally."

"Is Sev...er...Professor Snape all right?"

Poppy chuckled at the slip-up of Severus's name. The boy was looking down at his hands. The sad expression on his face nearly broke her heart.

"Yes, dear, Severus is fine," she said. She smiled when she saw Harry visibly relax. "You know, he hasn't left you alone since you got here," she told him, deciding to ignore the first week Severus spent hiding in his rooms.

"Really?" asked Harry. At Poppy's nod, he frowned. "Then why isn't he here now?"

"Oh, you know Severus," she smiled. "He doesn't like anyone to know that he actually has a heart. Except for the times when I had to force him to leave and bathe, he's been by your side the entire time. He left just before you woke up. I think he was scared of what you would think of him if you woke up and found out that he had stayed."

Harry smiled. Yes, that sounded like the Severus he loved. The more he thought about Poppy's words, the more Harry realized that what he had thought were dreams of Severus' confessing his love for Harry might actually be true. Maybe Severus did love him. Looking up at Poppy, Harry asked, "Can I go and talk to Severus?"

Poppy smiled and nodded her approval. "Of course you can. But go straight there and try not to tire yourself out too much. You did just recover from a coma, you know."

"Thanks, Poppy. I'll be careful." Harry got out of bed, hugged Poppy, and started to leave.

"Harry?" Poppy called out, trying not to laugh. "You might want to put on some actual clothes first."

Harry looked down at his hospital pajamas and blushed.

_xxx_

Harry walked down to the dungeons and knocked on the door. After a moment it opened to reveal a very tired Severus Snape. Harry could see the dark circles under his eyes, eyes that were filled with concern and something else as they looked down at Harry.

"Harry, I'm glad to see that you're doing better. You gave Poppy quite a scare, you know."

Harry knew that Severus was trying-and failing-to make Harry think that he hadn't been in the hospital all that time.

"Poppy told me that you stayed by my side the entire time," said Harry. There was no point in beating around the bush.

Severus immediately flushed at those words. Damn Poppy. She just couldn't keep anything to herself, could she?"

"Yes, well, someone had to keep an eye out for you, didn't they?" Severus demanded. "After all, you clearly can't take care of yourself."

Harry smiled. Severus was getting so defensive. Harry thought it was adorable. He stepped closer to Severus, and Severus stepped back a little. Harry kept walking until he had Severus backed against a wall. Still smiling, Harry leaned forward and kissed Severus.

_xxx_

As he felt warm lips press against his own, Severus wrapped his arms around Harry's waist and pulled his closer. He felt strong arms wrap around his neck and fingers entwine in his hair. He heard Harry moan and push his tongue into Severus' mouth, tasting everything. Severus had never been so aroused in his life. He knew that if this didn't stop now, he would never be able to stop.

Severus pushed Harry away slightly, but not hard enough to send the boy away far. Taking a deep breath, Severus rested his forehead against Harry's. He felt Harry give him one more chaste kiss on the lips before the younger man leaned back enough to look into Severus's eyes.

"Thank you so much for being there," whispered Harry sincerely. "I thought that everyone had forgotten about me."

"I could never forget about you," Severus whispered back.

"You saved my life as well," Harry told him.

"What are you talking about?"

"While I was in the coma or whatever, I heard you talking to me. You told me that you loved me, and that you needed me to come back."

Severus flushed some more. "I didn't think you would actually hear that."

"Well, I'm glad I did. That's the reason that I tried so hard to come back. I've loved you for so long, but I never thought that you would love me. When I heard that you did, however, I was overjoyed. I knew I had to get back here quickly before you decided that you wanted somebody else."

Severus kissed Harry's forehead. "I could never want somebody else. I've loved you for the past six months. Your being in a coma couldn't stop that."

Harry smiled sweetly up at Severus. "I love you," he said before kissing Severus full on the lips.

Breaking away from the kiss, Severus whispered, "I love you, too."

**Please review and tell me what you think!**


	5. Everything

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: OOC-ness

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Severus thinks about his life with Harry and how lucky he is to have Harry in his life.

**Song**: Everything

**Artist**: Alanis Morissette

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) alanismorissette (slash) everything (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

Harry Potter looked at his lover of ten months and sighed. No matter what he did, nothing seemed to convince Severus to open up. Harry had told Severus everything. He told Severus his hopes, dreams, fears, and desires. Severus hadn't told him anything in return. Harry was almost positive that Severus loved him in return, but his insecurities kept him from flat-out admitting his feelings. He was afraid that he'd be wrong and that Severus would reject him.

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xxx  
_

Harry sat in his chair in front of the fire thinking about Severus. The man had lived through so much. He had joined the Death Eaters foolishly thinking that he would gain some respect. Then he become a spy, risking his own life to atone for the mistake he had made when he was younger. Harry didn't think he had ever met a braver person in his entire life. He snuck a quick glance at his lover. The man was leaning over his desk grading papers. Harry could see the older man's quill skating over the parchment, no doubt covering the thing with red marks. Harry smiled and looked into the fire.

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xxx   
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Severus paused in his grading when he felt Harry's gaze return to the fire. He thought about their relationship. Harry was so young and beautiful. He had never been with anyone before Severus. Well, that's what he had said at least, but Severus knew that Harry wouldn't lie to him.

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xxx  
_

The young man was perfect in Severus's mind, too perfect. Severus knew that Harry deserved someone so much better than him, which was why Severus found opening up hard to do. He was sure that eventually Harry would realize that he deserved better and leave, and Severus wanted to make sure that his dignity would still be there when Harry did.

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xxx   
_

Severus sighed. He could see the sad look in Harry's eyes, and he hated himself for putting it there. He decided that his dignity wasn't as important to him as Harry was. So what if Harry left him one day? At least Severus would have the memories to live with, and he wanted those memories to be as happy as possible.

Making up his mind, Severus got up from his seat and walked over to where Harry was sitting one the couch. He knelt down beside his lover and took Harry's hands in his own. Harry looked at him, surprise, hope, and fear all mixed in his eyes. Severus took a deep breath and decided to get out everything he had to say before he changed his mind.

"I love you."

Harry looked shocked, and his eyes filled with tears. Severus didn't miss the joyous look in those eyes, and he was goaded to continue what he knew he had to say.

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything before. I was scared that you would change your mind about being with me. You're so beautiful...you deserve someone so much better than me."

_  
xxx   
_

"There is no one better than you," Harry whispered, leaning forward to wrap his arms around Severus. Then he pressed his lips gently against Severus's, smiling as he pulled back and saw the happiness on Severus's face.

_  
xxx _

"I love you, too," Harry said, resting his head on Severus's shoulder. Severus shifted so that the two of them could lay down on the couch. Then Severus wrapped his arms around Harry, pulling the younger man up against his chest. Harry never felt more loved than he did at that moment. He had also never felt safer.

As Severus listened to Harry's deep breathing, he marveled yet again at how someone so beautiful could be in love with him. Smiling, Severus pulled Harry closer and fell asleep.


	6. Falling for You

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **None

**Spoilers: **None

**Summary: **Severus has been hurt and vows to never fall in love again. Then he meets Harry.

**Song: **Falling for You

**Artist: **Jem

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) jem (slash) fallingforyou (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

Lucius Malfoy was an extremely handsome individual. He had perfect skin, silvery-blond hair, and piercing silver eyes. Everyone in Slytherin wanted to be with him, which was why Severus was astounded when the man chose him. But he was happy, nonetheless.

_xxx  
_

Well, happy until he realized that Malfoy didn't really want him. All Malfoy wanted was to get more people to join this man he called the Dark Lord. Severus wasn't sure exactly what this Dark Lord wanted, but if it would make Malfoy love him, then Severus would do whatever was asked of him. He soon realized that Malfoy didn't care for him at all, but was simply using him. He also realized that this Dark Lord wasn't nearly as great as Malfoy was always pretending. Severus realized what a huge mistake he had made, and went running to Dumbledore for help.

That was the day that Severus Snape vowed never to fall in love again.

_  
xxx_

Now it was almost thirty years later, and Harry Potter was teaching at Hogwarts. Severus cursed his luck. Of course the brat would be teaching beside him. The boy just couldn't move on like everyone else in his year did. No, of course not. He had to stay here so Severus would be forced to be near that beautiful creature day after day and not be able to do a damn thing about it. After all, he knew that Harry would never want to be with him. Besides, Severus had made a promise to himself, and he wasn't about to break it.

_  
xxx  
_

He didn't know how it had happened, but somehow he found himself in a relationship with Harry Potter. But he wasn't falling in love. No, not him. He and Harry had a strictly physical relationship. The reason Harry stayed curled up around him afterward was simply because he didn't want to be caught roaming the halls after dark.

Severus sighed. No matter what he told himself, his heart knew the truth. He was falling deeply in love with Harry, breaking his own rules. He knew that their relationship wouldn't last forever. Harry was young, and young people didn't stay in relationships forever. They had flings, and when they grew tired of one partner they moved on to someone new. Severus knew this, and therefore knew that his days with Harry were limited.

_  
xxx  
_

Harry noticed that Severus seemed worried all the time, but he didn't know why. The only thing he could think of was that Severus was worried about their relationship. Not really knowing what to do, Harry tried to assure Severus of his love all the time. He made sure to touch Severus outside the bedroom in little ways, so Severus wouldn't think that Harry only equated touch with sex. Harry made sure to always show his support when Severus appeared to be having a hard time. He told Severus about his friends so that Severus would feel like he was a part of Harry's life. And in case all that didn't work. Harry told Severus that he loved him almost everyday.

But nothing seemed to work. Severus pulled away from all of his touches. He never talked to Harry about what was troubling him, and he looked annoyed whenever Harry started to talk about his friends. Worst of all, Severus would turn his back and ignore Harry whenever the younger man would confess his love. As time wore on, Harry became more and more positive that Severus was only interested in him for sex, and therefore he became depressed.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus could see Harry's hurt whenever his sentiments went unreturned. He saw the sadness whenever he pulled away from Harry's touch. He saw the pain in Harry's eyes whenever Severus seemed bored with Harry's friends or didn't share his problems. Severus felt guilty. He now admitted to himself that he loved Harry, but he was still afraid. He remembered the last time he had gotten into a relationship, and that hadn't ended well. But Harry wasn't Lucius Malfoy, of that Severus was certain. He therefore vowed to try harder to show Harry that he was loved.

_xxx_

As the next few weeks passed by, Harry noticed a definite change in Severus. For starters, the man shared more of the things that happened with Harry. He complained about the kids and the other professors and Dumbledore.

Severus asked how Ron and Hermione were and didn't look as if he were about to fall asleep whenever Harry talked about them. And he didn't pull away from Harry's touches anymore. On the contrary, he seemed to go out of his way to touch Harry whenever possible, and not in a sexual way.

He still hadn't confessed his love for Harry, but the younger man was ecstatic about the improvements Severus had made. Harry made sure that Severus knew his effort were appreciated. Harry made sure to kiss Severus whenever he could, and he smiled a lot more than he had in a long time. _xxx_

Severus lay in his bed, his arms wrapped tightly around Harry. Severus prayed to any deity that was listening that his love wouldn't leave him. He didn't think he could take that hurt again. Severus looked down at his sleeping mate and pressed a chaste kiss to his head and whispered, "I love you."

Severus was just about to fall asleep when he heard Harry whisper, "I love you, too."


	7. Gifts and Curses

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Severus is in love with Harry, but he thinks that Harry would never want him. Harry, on the other hand, thinks differently.

**Song**: Gifts and Curses

**Artist**: Yellowcard (Spiderman2 Soundtrack)

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) yellowcard (slash) giftsandcurses (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

__

xxx   


Severus Snape watched as the soon-to-be-savoir of the wizarding world buttered his toast. Severus sighed. He loved Harry, and he wasn't afraid to admit it. Well, to himself that is. But he knew he could never be with Harry. He was, after all, an ex-Death Eater. What chance did he have with the boy who lived?

_  
xxx   
_

Over the next few months, Severus convinced himself that he wouldn't have a shot to be with Harry. His job was to train Harry for battle, which he thought he had done spectacularly. He was supposed to help fight the Death Eaters and Voldemort. He was supposed to protect Harry. He wasn't supposed to fall in love with him.

_  
xxx   
_

Before he knew it, the final battle had arrived. Severus stood alongside Harry, fighting Death Eaters and trying to keeps his young love safe. Harry was doing a great job. But Voldemort showed up while Harry was fighting Bellatrix Lestrange. Harry, so caught up in his duel, didn't notice his arrival. Nor did he notice Voldemort raise his wand and send a curse toward Harry.

_xxx   
_

But Severus noticed. Without consciously recognizing what he was doing, Severus ran and pushed Harry out of the way so that he got hit with the curse instead. His last conscious thought was that he wished he had at least told Harry about his feelings. Then the world went black.

_  
xxx _

Severus woke up and noticed the bright lights of the hospital wing. Blinking against the harsh light, he noticed a figure curled up on the chair beside his bed. As his eyes adjusted to the light, Severus realized that the figure was Harry.

Madame Pomfrey, sensing that Severus was awake, bustled over and check his vitals.

"You are a very lucky man, Severus Snape. You should be able to get out of here in a few days."

"How long have I been asleep?" he asked groggily.

"A little over a week," Madame Pomfrey informed him, "ever since Harry destroyed Voldemort."

"He destroyed him?" asked Severus, staring at Harry with a mixture of pride and love in his eyes. "How long has he been there?"

"Since you were brought in," said Madame Pomfrey gently, smiling at the love she had seen in Severus's eyes. "He refused to leave your side, not even to join any of the celebration feasts." __

xxx

Severus stared down at Harry in shock. He hadn't left the hospital wing at all? Well, that would explain why his clothes were so wrinkled. Once Madame Pomfrey had walked away, Severus reached over and gently shook Harry awake.

Harry blinked and brought his hands up to his eyes to shield them from the sudden light. He yawned. Then he saw Severus. His face broke into a relieved smile, and, before Severus knew what he was doing, Harry flung his arms around Severus and gave him a big hug.

Severus sat there in shock, not knowing what to do. Harry sensed Severus's discomfort and immediately drew back, his smiled gone.

"Sorry," he mumbled, looking down at his hands and backing away from Severus. __

xxx

Severus reached up and gently rubbed his thumb over the back of Harry's hand. Harry gasped and looked up.

"You have nothing to be sorry for," Severus told him. He paused for a moment. "Why did you stay here all this time?"

Harry blushed and looked down at their joined hands.

"I had to make sure that you would be alright," he said quietly. He took a deep breath. "I love you."

Severus stared at the young man in front of him in shock. Had Harry really just said what he thought he had?"

"Do you think there's any chance that you could ever love me back?" asked Harry in a small voice. Severus looked at him. Harry seemed frightened.

Instead of answering verbally, Severus pulled Harry closer and pressed his lips against Harry's. When they pulled apart, Severus whispered to him, "I already love you."

Harry smiled and kissed Severus back. Severus moved over to allow Harry enough room to lay down. Harry climbed into the bed and snuggled closer to Severus.


	8. Head over Feet

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: OOC-ness

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Harry convinces Severus to start a relationship with him. Severus realizes how wonderful Harry is.

**Song**: Head over Feet

**Artist**: Alanis Morissette

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) alanismorissette (slash) headoverfeet (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

At first Severus found Harry's constant presence annoying. After all, how was he supposed to enjoy his breakfast when Potter was right there, hinting at what a great couple to two of them would make. Some days he didn't even hint at it; he flat-out told Severus that he thought they'd make a great couple. Severus ignored him every time. __

xxx

Over the next several months, Harry seemed determined to show Severus why they would make a great couple. Harry made sure that Severus ate enough. He made sure that Severus was getting enough sleep. He asked how Severus's day was and seemed genuinely interested in the reply-not that he often got one. Severus brushed off Harry's questions, but at the same time was internally pleased that someone seemed to care about him. __

xxx

After another month or so, Severus finally admitted that he loved Harry. To himself. He decided that he had nothing to lose by giving this relationship a try. So one night when Harry was making his usual trip down to Severus's rooms, Severus gave in and agreed to start a relationship with Harry. Harry was ecstatic.

xxx

It wasn't long before the Daily Prophet learned that the Boy Who Lived was dating an ex-Death Eater. There was an instant uproar. The people didn't like the fact that their savoir was dating filth. Severus was sure that Harry would back off now that his public was turning on him, but he was surprised.

Harry stood before the world and told them that Severus was the bravest man he had ever met. He told them that Severus was the reason he even knew how to fight Voldemort, and that Severus was the reason that Harry was still alive today. Harry's words were printed in every paper, and eventually the hate mail stopped coming to Severus. Severus was amazed. That Harry thought enough of him to defend him in front of everyone gave Severus a warm feeling in the pit of his stomach.__

xxx

That night was one of the best nights of Severus's life. They had sex like usual, but it was so much more incredible than it was before. Severus could feel his love for Harry coming out with every caress, every thrust, every kiss. Afterward, Harry turned around in his arms and whispered, "I love you."_xxx  
_

Severus felt his throat tighten at hearing those words. He knew that he loved Harry as well, but he wasn't ready to say it aloud yet. He told Harry as much, and he begged for Harry to be patient with him. Harry just smiled, gave him a kiss, and said that he had all the time in the world.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus decided that before he could admit his love, Harry needed to know more about him. Severus found himself discussing his childhood with Harry, sharing everything that had made him so afraid to fall in fall, everything that made him so sure he was unlovable. To his surprise, Harry understood exactly how he felt, and therefore knew exactly how to comfort him. Severus had never allowed anyone to comfort him before, but now that he was with Harry, if felt right.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus woke up safe and warm. He realized he had never felt this good before. He knew, as he looked down at the sleeping man next to him, that he owed everything to Harry. He couldn't believe there had been a time when he had been afraid to show his feelings. Harry made him feel like he was the most precious person on earth, and yet the younger man had never asked for anything in return. Severus decided that it was high time he showed Harry how much he meant to him.

_  
xxx_

Severus tip-toed out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. He then prepared a huge meal consisting of all of Harry's favorite foods. Severus walked back into their bedroom and set the tray down on the nightstand. Then he leaned over and kissed Harry.

Harry felt warm lips press against his own and smiled. Blinking against the harsh light, Harry took in Severus's face above him.

"Morning," he yawned, stretching a bit before collapsing back against the pillows.

"Good morning," replied Severus. "I made you breakfast."

Harry looked at the huge mountain of food beside the bed and started. Severus had really gone out of his way this morning. He wondered what the occasion was. His confusion seemed to show on his face, because Severus continued talking.

"You've been so patient with me all this time. You stayed interested in me all that time before I admitted I wanted a relationship with you. You let me take my time getting comfortable around you. No body has ever acting this...loving toward me before. I didn't know how to react. I was scared. But now I realize that I had nothing to be scared of. You are the most beautiful person I have ever met, and you are the most caring person I have ever met. What I wanted to say is that...I love you."

Harry's eyes filled with happy tears at Severus's confession. He had waited so long to hear those words. Harry flung himself at Severus, wrapping his arms around the older man and sobbing quietly into his shoulder. Severus held Harry close, rubbing his back gently and pressing kisses to the top of his head.

"I love you, too," Harry cried. "I love you so much."

Severus rocked Harry gently as he cried. Neither had ever been happier. They just sat there all morning, holding each other. The food lay forgotten next to the table.


	9. I'm a Believer

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **Mpreg

**Spoilers: 1-6**

**Summary: **Harryteaches Severus how to believe in love

**Song: **I'm a Believer

**Artist: **Smash Mouth (though I think someone else did it first)

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) smashmouth (slash) imabeliever (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

When he was younger, Severus Snape had tried to fall in love. He tried to get involved with people. But no one seemed to want anything to do with him. The Slytherins didn't want anything to do with him because he was a half-blood, and the other houses didn't want anything to do with him because he was in Slytherin. When he was older no one wanted him because he was a Death Eater. And Death Eaters aren't allowed to fall in love. So Severus eventually gave up.

_  
xxx   
_

Now it was years later, and Severus met Harry. Not Potter, the annoying student who was constantly messing up his life. Harry, the young man who Severus watched struggle with enormous tasks after Dumbledore's death his sixth year. Yes, Severus had been the one to kill Dumbledore, but he hadn't wanted to. Dumbledore had made him, and after his penseive was viewed, everyone knew the truth.

_  
xxx   
_

Severus was deeply in love with Harry, but he knew he didn't have a shot. Harry was young, beautiful, and caring. He would never want Severus for very long, if he even wanted him at all. Severus knew that, so he didn't even try.

_  
xxx  
_

Somehow, Severus found himself in a relationship with Harry. He didn't know how Harry had managed to break through all his defenses, but he had. Now the two of them were living together down in Severus's rooms. And even though Severus knew that this was sure to end badly, he knew he wouldn't be the one to call it off, no matter what.

_xxx_

One day Severus was walking outside the castle when he overheard Harry talking to Ron Weasley. Not wanting to betray Harry's trust, Severus turned to leave. That was, until he heard his name mentioned.

"I'll tell Severus in a few days, Ron. I know that I need to tell him, but I'm not sure how he'll react. He doesn't even like other people looking at me. How's he going to react when he finds out that I'm going to be sharing my life with someone else?"

Paling, Severus turned and left. So he was right. Relationships never last forever. Harry was going to leave him for another man. Severus told himself that he knew this was coming, that he knew Harry would one day leave him. But that didn't help the pain in his chest any.

_  
xxx_

Even though he knew that Harry was going to leave him, Severus still couldn't bring himself to call off the relationship first. Was it so wrong to want a few more days with the man he loved? Three days later Harry walked in looking very fidgety. Severus knew this was going to be the night that Harry broke up with him, and he felt his chest tighten again. He was about to open his mouth and kick Harry out when the younger man spoke first.

"I'm pregnant."

"What?" Severus stared in shock. Harry was pregnant?

"I'm pregnant," Harry repeated, staring down at his shaking hands. "I wanted to tell you before, but I was afraid how you would react. I know you don't like kids very much, and there's no way that I'm going to give up my baby. She's going to be a big part of my life from now on. If you don't want her, I'll take care of him on my own. I just need to know what you want."

Right now Severus wanted to punch himself for thinking that Harry would cheat on him. Harry would never do that; Severus should have known. Pregnant? Harry was pregnant with his child? Severus didn't know what to say. As he saw the fear of rejection in Harry's eyes, however, he knew what he had to do. He knelt down in front of Harry and kissed his hands.

"I love you," he said. "And I'll love our baby, too."

Harry smiled at that. He hugged Severus tightly, his eyes filling with tears. When they pulled away and Severus saw the relief on Harry's face, he could have kicked himself.

"I have a confession to make," he said. "I overheard you and Ron talking in the forest, and I thought that you were planning on leaving me for another man."

The smile disappeared from Harry's face. He looked sadly up at Severus and ran his hand gently up Severus's cheek.

"I'll never leave you," Harry said sincerely. "That is, as long as you never leave me."

"Never," vowed Severus.

_  
xxx_

Eight months later Harry gave birth to a beautiful baby girl with jet black hair and sparkling black eyes. Harry held the baby close, kissed her, and then handed her to Severus. As Severus looked back and forth from his newborn baby to his husband, he realized he had never been happier. At that moment, Severus knew for a fact that love existed, and he knew that he was never going to give it up.


	10. Just Want You to Know

**Rating**: R

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: OOC-ness

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Harry meets up with Sev in a bar, and the two start a relationship. When Harry confesses his feelings, Severus pushes Harry away. But is that really what Severus wanted to do?

**Song**: Just Want You to Know

**Artist**: Backstreet Boys

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) backstreetboys (slash) justwantyoutoknow (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_  
xxx  
_

Twenty-year-old Harry Potter sipped his drink and looked around the bar. There had to be someone here that he knew. Smirking, he made his way over to the corner where Severus Snape stood looking around the room.

"Well, well, well, look at what the cat dragged in," snarled Severus as he saw Harry, though his usual malice had disappeared. Harry smiled.

"Nice to see you, too, Severus," he said. "How have you been?"

"Did you really come over here simply to ask how I've been?"

"Well, I thought I'd start out with that," smirked Harry, taking a sip of his drink and leaning seductively into Severus. "But I hoped that you might be interested in something more."

Severus grabbed his arm and pulled him into the nearest room.

_  
xxx  
_

After that day Harry and Severus spent more and more time together. Both agreed that the sex was great, but there was more to it. Harry felt safe when he was around Severus, safer than he had ever felt before. And although Severus never said anything, Harry was sure that Severus felt something more as well.

_  
xxx_

They had been dating for a few months when Harry finally decided to say what he felt. He was curled up in Severus's lap on the couch, looking into the fire. Harry leaned back and kissed Severus gently on the lips.

"I love you," he whispered, praying that Severus would respond favorably. Instead, Severus stood up so fast that Harry was nearly thrown off the couch.

"I think we should break up."

"What?" gasped Harry, sure that he had heard wrong.

"You heard me," snarled Severus. "This was fun for a while, but you have clearly gotten too attached. We should end this before either one of us gets hurt."

And with that Severus turned and walked out of the room.

"Well it's a little late for that!" Harry yelled after him. Then he broke down on the couch and sobbed. __

xxx

Harry spent the next week confined to his bed. He didn't eat. He didn't sleep. He didn't do anything but cry and stare at the walls. Try as he might, he just couldn't get his mind off of Severus. __

xxx

Ron and Hermione came over. They tried everything they could think of to cheer Harry up. Ron threatened to kill Severus, but that only made Harry sadder. Harry knew that his friends were trying, but it wasn't working. All he could think of was whatever he had done to push Severus away and how he knew that Severus would never come back. __

xxx  


Harry tried dating other people, but that didn't work either. He wasn't interested in one-night-stands, and the people who wanted relationships deserved someone better, someone who could actually love them. Harry couldn't do that. He loved Severus with all his heart. No one else made him feel the way that he felt when he was with Severus.

Harry sighed and plopped down on his couch, the same couch on which he had confessed his love for Severus. Harry started to cry again. There was a knock on the door. Taking a deep breath, Harry wiped away his tears and answered the door. He felt his jaw drop.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus was standing on the other side of the door, looking just about as bad as Harry felt. His greasier-than-normal hair was a mess, and he looked as if he hadn't slept in a month.

"What are you doing here?" asked Harry quietly.

"I love you," said Severus.

"W-what do you mean that you love me?" asked Harry breathlessly. "Then why did you leave when I told you that I loved you?"

"I was scared," Severus admitted. "I've never loved anyone as much as I love you, and that scared me, so I ran. I know that I've probably lost any chance I might have had with you, but I just wanted you to know that."

_  
xxx_

Harry looked at Severus in shock. Then his face broke into a smile. He launched himself at Severus and wrapped his arms around the older man's neck. Severus's arms wrapped instinctively around Harry's waist. Harry pressed his lips to Severus's. They kissed passionately for a long time until the need for air became too strong.

"I love you, too," Harry whispered, pressing a chaste kiss to Severus's lips. "Just promise to never, ever do that again."

Severus kissed Harry back. "I promise."


	11. Kill

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Angst

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Harry loves Severus, but Severus is only interested in sex.

**Song**: Kill

**Artist**: Jimmy Eat World

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) jimmyeatworld (slash) kill (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

After standing up to the Minister of Magic, countless Death Eaters, and Lord Voldemort, one would think that simply walking across the street to talk to Severus Snape would be a simple task. After all, the man had fought for them. He was on their side. And Harry was sure that he had seen the older man throw a few interested looks his direction. So what was the problem?

_xxx_

Taking a deep breath, Harry walked into Severus's apothecary. The man had built it after the war when he had decided to stop teaching. Harry had been there before. But this time was different. This time Harry was going to ask Severus to accompany him to dinner. Surely that wasn't such a big question. It wouldn't be so bad.

_xxx_

Looking back, Harry probably should have been suspicious of how quickly Severus accepted his offer. After all, though the two of them had been getting along better as of late, they still weren't what you would call friends. But at the time, Harry was simply content to be getting a chance with the older man. And he was determined not to blow it.

_xxx_

They "dated" on and off for a few months. Since Harry was a Quidditch player, he didn't have too much time to spend with Severus. That didn't matter, though. They made up for the time apart in numerous ways. Harry was finding himself growing more and more attached to Severus and began to worry. Their relationship was based on sex; Harry wasn't naïve enough to think that it was based on love or anything like that. How would Severus feel knowing that Harry was starting to fall in love?

_xxx_

One major thing that Severus didn't know was that Harry had been a virgin when they had gotten together. However, since Harry had spent loads of time fooling around with the Weasley twins, he hadn't been completely innocent. He had topped before, but he had never actually been deflowered, so to speak.

_xxx_

Hermione didn't think much of his relationship with Severus. She frowned whenever Severus would falsely accuse Harry of doing something wrong when it had been Severus's fault. Harry assured her that Severus wasn't being unfair. He told her that Severus took blame for the things that were his fault, as well. But he was lying, and he knew it. Severus never stepped up and admitted that he was wrong, ever. Everything that went wrong was Harry's fault. In his mind, Harry believed Hermione. His pride, on the other hand, would never let himself admit it. After all, Harry Potter does not admit defeat. Especially to Severus Snape.

_xxx_

As the days wore on, Harry could feel Severus pulling further and further away. He didn't spent as much time with Harry as he used to, and whenever he did spent time with Harry he seemed distracted. Harry didn't know what to do. He wanted to be treated better, but he didn't want to be alone.

_xxx  
_

After being around Harry for so long, Severus felt he knew him pretty well. And because he knew him so well, he knew that Harry had fallen in love with him. Severus knew that he didn't love Harry; he didn't love anyone. He planned on making sure that Harry knew that as well.

Harry, on the other hand, knew that Severus knew that Harry loved him. He didn't know what he would do if Severus confronted him about it. Would Harry deny his love for Severus? Or would he stand up straight and admit his feelings?

_  
xxx_

Harry got his answer soon enough. Severus walked up to him one day and said, without any preamble, "I don't love you. You're great in bed, and I am willing to continue our relationship, but you must realize that I will never love you. What do you have to say?"

"I love you," said Harry quietly, not looking Severus in the eye. "I love you, and nothing you do is going to change that. But I know that you do not, and never will, love me. I'm willing to live with that."

_xxx_

Now it was a year later, and Harry was thinking about their relationship. Severus still didn't love him, not that Harry ever had any hope that he would. Harry knew that he should break it off with Severus, and find someone who would love him. But he was terrified of being alone. If Severus didn't love him, what made him think that anyone else would? Then not only would he not have anyone who loved him, he would be completely alone, even more alone than he was now. And because of that, Harry knew that he could never leave Severus. He would just have to deal with life the best way he knew how, and that was to take what he was given and not to complain.

Now if only he could get his heart to agree.

**A/n: All right, I know. This story sucks. I love this song, though, so I thought I'd go ahead and put it in here. Had I been able to find a better song that started with the letter K I would have put that one in here instead. **


	12. Like the Rose

**Rating: **R

**Genres: **Romance, Fluff

**Warnings: **sexual situations

**Spoilers: **n/a

**Summary: **Harry comes up with a plan that he knows will get him into Severus's bed.

**Song: **Like the Rose

**Artist: **BWitched

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) bwitched (slash) liketherose (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

Harry sat at his usual seat at Gryffindor table gazing longingly up that the head table. Severus Snape sat on one side of Dumbledore as usual, a frown on his face. Oh how Harry wished the man would love him back. He had tried several times to convince the older man to give him a chance, but Severus had refused each time. Harry decided to take things a step further this time.

_xxx   
_

That night Harry made his way down to Severus's rooms. He was naked under his invisibility cloak. He knocked on Severus's door and waited for the older man to answer. As soon as the door opened Harry pushed his way inside and threw off the cloak. He pushed Severus against the wall and started ravishing the older man's mouth.

_  
xxx _Severus tried to push Harry away, but the younger man wouldn't budge. He kept kissing Severus, forcing his tongue into the older man's mouth. Severus struggled for a moment, but eventually surrendered and kissed Harry back with the same enthusiasm.

_  
xxx   
_

The two stumbled into Severus's bedroom and collapsed on the bed. Harry hurriedly undressed Severus. They kept kissing as Severus grabbed the lubricant and started to prepare Harry. Harry stiffened as the fingers were added, but eventually relaxed into them. When the fingers were replaced with Severus's long length, Harry let out a hiss of pain. Severus gently pushed all the way in, pausing to make sure that Harry had adjusted. Then he started to move.

Harry had never felt so much passion and gentleness at one time before. Being under Severus felt amazing. Harry hadn't thought feeling this much pleasure had been possible. He met Severus thrust for thrust, losing himself in Severus. He cried out Severus's name as he came, pushing Severus to the edge as well. Severus screamed out Harry's name before collapsing on top of him, all his energy drained.

_  
xxx_

Harry fell asleep with Severus curled up behind him. He knew he should probably head back to his dorms, but he was far too comfortable to care. He had never felt so safe and warm before. The last thing he remembered before falling asleep was Severus' pressing a kiss to the top of his head.


	13. Mad Season

**Rating: **R

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **sexual content

**Spoilers: **n/a

**Summary: **Harry's playing Quidditch prevents him from spending time with Severus. Severus gets fed up and leaves. Which will be more important to Harry, his job or his love?

**Song: **Mad Season

**Artist: **Matchbox 20

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) lyricsfreak (dot) com (slash) m (slash) matchbox-twenty (slash) 90661 (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

Harry and Severus had been in a relationship for a few years. Every year was the same. They would spend months with each other, showering each other with love. Then Quidditch season would come along, and Harry would be forced to leave and spend practically all of his time with the team. Severus had never complained. Before now.

_  
xxx  
_

This season, Harry noticed that Severus seemed more impatient than normal. Harry wondered if it was because he was always so busy, but he didn't see how it could be since it was like this every year, and Severus had never complained before now.

_  
xxx_

The thing Harry hated most about Quidditch was the girls that loved to follow him around whenever he played. He told them time and time again that he had a boyfriend, but either they didn't listen or they didn't care. Harry wasn't sure which was it. All he was sure of was that he wished he was with Severus instead.

_  
xxx  
_

Harry went home to Severus after the game. Severus seemed angry, though Harry couldn't figure out why. The sex was a lot rougher than usual that night. Harry wouldn't have minded except it was almost to the point of painful. When it was over Severus turned his back to Harry and fell asleep. He had never done that before. He usually curled up with Harry afterward. Harry wondered what he did wrong.

_  
xxx   
_

When Harry got back from the next game Severus was gone. There was a note on the table from Severus saying that he couldn't take this relationship anymore. He couldn't take barely seeing Harry for months. He wanted a lover that was with him, not away from him.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus left. That was all Harry got out of that message the first time he read it. Severus had left him. The tears started falling before Harry could stop them. He collapsed onto the bed and sobbed.

Over the next few weeks Harry tried to go on with Quidditch, but it wasn't the same knowing that Severus wasn't home waiting for him. Harry's mind was always on Severus instead of the game, which threw off his flying. Harry's flying was so bad during practice that the coach threatened to kick him off the team. That gave Harry an idea, and it was so obvious he couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before.

_  
xxx_

Severus sat in the kitchen of Snape Manor drinking his coffee and reading his paper. Today was the final game of the Quidditch World Cup. Harry was sure to win, of course. The young man was an excellent flyer.

Seeing the picture of Harry on the front page caused Severus's chest to tighten. Damn but he missed that boy. But it had been so hard. Severus hadn't said anything for the longest time, but eventually it all became too much. He couldn't live with having Harry drop by whenever he had time off. He wanted someone who cared about his more than he cared about a game.

Severus heard a pounding on his door and went to answer it. He was shocked to see Harry standing there, in his Quidditch robes, gasping for breath.

"Harry," said Severus, still in shock. "What are you doing here? You have a game to play."

Harry shook his head. "I quit. I don't need to play some stupid game, Sev. I need you. I've been miserable since you've been gone. Quidditch isn't even fun anymore. Please, give me another chance. I'll find a job that lets me be home more. Please?"

Severus stared down at Harry in absolute shock. Harry really cared about him enough to quit playing Quidditch? No one had ever given up anything for Severus before. Severus felt his chest tighten again, but this time it was a good feeling. He reached out and pulled Harry to him, smiling when he felt Harry's arms immediately wind around him in return.

"I love you," Severus whispered against Harry's ear. Harry pulled back enough to look Severus in the eyes.

"I love you, too," he said. _  
_


	14. Naked

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **OOC-ness

**Spoilers: **n/a

**Summary: **Harry helps Severus open up.

**Song: **Naked

**Artist: **Avril Lavigne

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) allavril (dot) com (slash) Naked (dot) shtml

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

Severus woke up in a bad mood as usual. Minerva was always telling him to loosen up a bit, that he was always in a bad mood. Severus wanted to tell her that she would be in a bad mood as well if the man she loved hated her, but he wisely kept his mouth shut. No, no one could know that he was in love with the Boy Who Lived. No one. He wasn't allowed to fall in love with Harry. Harry hated him. He was the evil Potions Master, the one who made Harry's life a living hell. There was no way that Harry would love him.

_xxx_

Harry was very good at reading people. It was a habit he had picked up when he was younger that had stuck with him. Since he was so good at reading people, he was sure that Severus was romantically interested in him. Why else would the man keep giving him wistful looks? Severus was definitely interested, but he was also insecure. Harry knew that about Severus, and that's why he had to do something to be with the man. He knew Severus would never be the one to start it.

_xxx_

Harry stayed after Potions one day. After making sure that everyone was gone, he locked the door and put up a silencing charm. Then he made his way to the front of the room where Severus stood, looking at him in shock.

"Mr. Potter, what exactly do you think you're—"

The rest of his sentence was cut short by Harry's lips' covering Severus's. The older man tensed and pushed Harry away.

"What are you doing?" he demanded angrily, but Harry could see the fear in his eyes.

"I was kissing you," Harry told him, stepping close again. Severus backed away. "I like you, and I know that you like me, too."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," lied Snape.

Harry stepped close again, and this time Severus walked into a wall. Harry leaned his body against Severus's. He heard the older man's breath hitch. Harry leaned up and kissed Severus again, gentler this time.

"I like you a lot," he said again. "I wanted to know if you wanted to accompany me to dinner on Saturday. I mean, I graduate in a few days, so you won't have to worry about getting in trouble. Please?"

Severus stared down at Harry in shock.

"If this is some prank to get me to—"

"This isn't a prank!" Harry insisted. "Use Legilimency on me if you don't believe me, since you know I can't lie to you."

Severus considered his words. That was true; Harry couldn't lie to him. Severus stared Harry in the eyes and was shocked to find that the young man was telling the truth. He honestly wanted to go on a date with Severus.

_xxx_

Eight months later Severus contemplated his relationship with Harry. He realized that he had never been in such a loving relationship before. Harry was sweet and kind and loving. He never let Severus put himself down, and he always found a way to make Severus feel better.

One night they were cuddled up on the sofa in front of the fire when Severus turned around so he could look Harry in the eye.

"I love you," he said.

Harry smiled bigger than Severus had ever seen him smile before. He hugged Severus tightly and whispered, "I love you, too."

_xxx_

After dating for a little more than a year, Severus knew that there was no way he was ever going to be able to let Harry go. He loved Harry more than he ever thought he could love anyone.

He lit candles all around the room and charmed some soft music to play in the background. He cooked Harry's favorite dish and waited for his love to come home.

Harry was surprised when he stepped into the room and saw what Severus had set up. Everything looked so romantic. Smiling, Harry kissed Severus and asked what the special occasion was. Instead of answering, Severus got down on one knee and pulled out a velvet box. Harry's breath hitched.

"Harry Potter, will you marry me?" Severus asked.

Harry was speechless. He stared down at Severus in shock for a moment before launching himself at the older man, knocking them both to the floor.

"Yes!" Harry cried, pressed kisses all over Severus's face. "Yes, yes, of course I'll marry you!"

Severus smiled at Harry's enthusiasm. To be honest, he had been afraid that Harry would say no. He was thrilled that Harry was so happy to marry him. As Severus looked down at the smiling face of his fiancé, Severus knew that he would do anything he possibly could to keep Harry as happy as he was right now.

**a/n: This story was a lot better in my head than it turned out to be. Sorry. **


	15. Only One

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: books 1-5

**Summary**: Harry always confesses his love for Severus, but Severus never says anything back, so Harry leaves. Severus regrets pushing Harry away, and wants to get his Harry back. Storyline similar to that of "Hard to Say" only with a happy ending the first time around instead of the crappy sequel.

**Song**: Only One

**Artist**: Yellowcard

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) yellowcard (slash) onlyone (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

Severus Snape stood on the doorstep, his hand poised just above the doorbell. He didn't move. Pushing that little button should have been an easy thing to do. But it wasn't; it was the most difficult thing he had ever tried to do. Well, one of the most difficult things. __

xxx

It was a few months before the final battle. Harry and Severus had spent months training, preparing for the fight. Neither one of them commented on the attraction growing between them because neither one of them wanted to be the one to talk about it first. Then one night after a round of duels, Severus invited Harry to his rooms for a drink. Harry happily accepted. Several hours and many drinks later found Harry and Severus naked and tangled up in Severus's bed. __

xxx

Four months later Harry defeated Voldemort. There were numerous parties to celebrate the bastard's downfall. Despite his infinite invitations, Harry didn't attend a single one. Instead, he spent the next few months moving in to Severus's apartment (since the potions master had finally decided to quite teaching and open the apothecary he had always dreamed of having) and spending as much time as possible with the older wizard. _  
_

_xxx  
_

Things were going fine for the next few months. Their relationship seemed to go downhill the first time Harry admitted to loving Severus. In his heart, Severus had been thrilled to hear those words. But in his mind, Severus was too afraid to say them back. He wanted to, god but he wanted to. But there was always that nagging little voice telling him that Harry would change his mind soon and leave. So Severus ignored Harry's pained looks and went on acting normally.

That drove Harry to the breaking point. Six months after he confessed his feelings, Harry packed his bags and left while Severus was at work. When Severus returned he found the apartment half-empty and a note on the table with Harry's new address on it. It said that Harry would be willing to come back as soon as Severus admitted his feelings. Deciding that Harry was better off without him, Severus didn't go after him. Nor did he throw away the note. Instead, he placed it on his nightstand, right next to his picture of Harry.

_  
xxx_

Two months later, Severus knew he had made a terrible mistake by letting Harry go. Harry was the only one who really knew and loved the real Severus. Harry didn't judge him for his past mistakes, didn't require long explanations for things that Severus truly did not want to talk about. Harry was always a calming presence in his life. And now the green-eyed wizard was gone because Severus was too insecure to admit that he loved the younger man. Severus eyed the note Harry had left him. That had been months ago. Would Harry have found someone else already? Even if he hadn't, would he still want Severus? Realizing that he had nothing to lose either way, Severus pulled on his cloak and headed over to Harry's. __

xxx

Severus stood on Harry's doorstep, his hand poised just above the doorbell. He didn't move. Pushing that little button should have been an easy thing to do. But it wasn't; it was the most difficult thing he had ever tried to do, next to forgetting about Harry, of course. Taking a deep breath, Severus gathered his courage and pushed the doorbell. No one answered. __

xxx  


Was Harry ignoring him? Or was he out on a date with someone else? Both seemed highly likely, and both made Severus feel slightly nauseous. Now what was he supposed to do? Harry clearly didn't want to talk to Severus, not that Severus could blame him. Severus debated leaving a note to let Harry know he was there, but decided against it. Harry deserved someone better, someone who wasn't afraid to admit his feelings. Sighing, Severus turned to walk away and jumped. He was standing face-to-face with Harry Potter.

_  
xxx_

"What are you doing here?" asked Harry.

"I, well, you see...I—" Harry smiled sweetly. He had never seen Severus this nervous before. He stepped a little closer to Severus, who tried to take a step backward and ended up walking into the door.

"I thought you were out with a lover," Severus whispered. Harry frowned.

"And how did that make you feel?" he asked slowly.

Severus took a deep breath. This was it. This was where he confessed his feelings and had Harry laugh at him. He thought back over the past two months he had spent alone and knew that this was his only chance to make things right.

"I was scared that I had lost you," he admitted brokenly. __

xxx

Harry stepped even closer to Severus and gently ran his hand down the older man's cheek. He felt Severus give a weak shudder and smiled.

"You'll never lose me," he said.

"I love you," said Severus, looking deep into Harry's eyes. Those green eyes started to water as they stared back at Severus. Harry leaned forward and pressed his lips to Severus'. He moaned as their tongues battled for dominance. Finally the need for air became to great, and they had to break apart.

Harry rested his forehead against Severus' and whispered, "I love you, too."

_  
xxx_

**For those of you who read "Hard to Say," was this one better? **

**Please review!**


	16. Pretend to be Nice

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Severus tries to lower Harry's self-esteem so that Harry will stay with him. Not the most conventional way to keep a lover.

**Song**: Pretend to be Nice

**Artist**: Josie and the Pussycats Soundtrack

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) stlyrics (dot) com (slash) lyrics (slash) josieandthepussycats (slash) pretendtobenice (dot) htm

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

Harry and Severus had been dating for over a year, and at first everything seemed wonderful. Severus didn't open up very much, but Harry could tell that the man was trying, so he was happy. Then Severus started to insult him. The first thing he insulted was Harry's hair.

"Doesn't that mop of a head of yours every lie flat?"

Then he insulted Harry's clothes.

"Honestly, your parents left you plenty of money. Can't you buy anything decent?"

_  
xxx.  
_

Then he insulted Harry's intelligence. In short, nothing Harry did ever seemed to be good enough for Severus. At first he had gotten mad, but eventually he started to believe that Severus was right. Maybe he _was_ stupid.

_  
xxx  
_

What hurt Harry the most was what Severus did when they were in public. Severus would constantly walk ahead of him while shopping, as if determined to prove that he wasn't with Harry. Whenever there was some ball or something that they were supposed to go to, Severus would leave before Harry and not speak to him. Harry once tried talking to Severus in public. Severus referred to him as "Mr. Potter" and acted like Harry was bothering him. Harry hadn't tried that again.

_  
xxx  
_

As time wore on, Harry tried to think of what he had done that had caused Severus to be so ashamed of him. After all, there was no doubting that Severus was ashamed of him. Why else would he always ignore Harry in public? Harry constantly beat himself up for things that he must have done wrong. He tried really hard to keep his hair under control and his robes nice and clean. He read as much as he could in order to try to improve his vocabulary. He wanted so much for Severus to be proud of him.

_  
xxx_

Severus watched as Harry became more and more depressed. He watched the young man try so hard to look and sound professional. Harry was in so much pain, which in turn caused Severus pain. He hadn't meant to hurt Harry. He was just so afraid that Harry would realize how much better he deserved and leave him. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, Severus was afraid, and when he was afraid he didn't act rationally.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus decided to leave for a week. He didn't tell Harry where he was going or why he left. He needed time to think about his relationship with Harry. Severus knew that he was in love with Harry, but he also knew that Harry deserved so much better. Harry deserved someone who would treat him kindly, someone who would show him what a beautiful and amazing person he was. Severus knew that soon someone would show Harry that kindness, and then Harry would leave him. Severus couldn't have that. But he also couldn't have Harry be in pain. That meant there was only one thing he could do. He would have to try to show Harry how much he meant to Severus.

_  
xxx  
_

When Severus got home he found Harry asleep in their bed. He looked so...sad. Sighing, Severus quickly changed into his night clothes and slipped into bed next to Harry. They usually slept on separate sides of the bed because Severus was too insecure to ask to be held.

But tonight was different. Tonight was the first night that Severus tried to be a better man. Taking a deep breath, Severus scooted closer to Harry and pull the younger man to his chest. He pressed a gentle kiss to Harry's head, leaned close to his love's ear, and whispered, "I love you." Then he pulled Harry even closer and fell asleep.

_  
xxx_

Harry opened his eyes and smiled. He had been awake when Severus came in, but he had been afraid of what Severus might say, so he pretended to be asleep. Now he was happy that he had pretended to be asleep. Severus loved him! Harry snuggled closer to Severus and fell into the first peaceful sleep he had had in a long time.

**A/n: I'm not sure what I think of Severus in this fic. I want to smack him for being an ass, and yet at the same time I feel sorry for him. What do you all think? **


	17. Quit Playing Games

**Rating: R**

**Genres: Romance, Angst**

**Warnings: OOC-ness**

**Spoilers: n/a**

**Summary: Harry's always fooling around with other men. Severus gets tired of it and leaves. **

**Song: Quit Playing Games (with my heart)**

**Artist: Backstreet Boys**

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) backstreetboys (slash) quitplayingameswithmyheart (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

__

xxx

_  
_Severus Snape was in his bed. The space next to him, usually occupied by Harry Potter, was empty. Again. That side of the bed had been empty a lot lately. Severus knew that Harry was seeing someone else. He would be gone until early morning, and then he would come crawling into bed smelling of sweat and sex. He'd always tell Severus that he was just hanging out with his friends. That it was other people having sex, not him. He was just hanging around with them.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus knew that he had made a mistake getting involved with someone as young as Harry. He knew what young men wanted. They wanted variety. They wanted hot, passionate fucking. They didn't want to make love with the same man for the rest of their lives. They didn't want to fall in love. And that was the problem. Severus was in love. He had fallen deeply in love with Harry, and now he didn't know if he had enough strength to leave him.

_  
xxx_

Severus's thoughts were interrupted by the opening of a door. Harry burst into the room and stumbled into the bed. Even before he smelled his breath, Severus knew he was drunk. Harry curled up around Severus and fell asleep. As he lie there, wrapped up around Harry, it was all he could do keep from crying. How he wished that Harry could love him as much as he loved Harry. Blinking back tears and taking a deep breath, Severus made up his mind. He would give Harry one more chance. If that didn't work, he would leave.

_xxx_

"I'm going out with Ron and Hermione," Harry said. "I'll be back late, so don't wait up for me."

"Harry, if you walk through that door don't expect me to be here when you return."

Harry stared at him incredulously.

"What the hell are you on about?" he demanded. "I can't see my friends now?"

"You know damn well that you're not going to see your friends," snapped Severus. "You're going to party, get drunk, and screw a couple of guys. How stupid do you expect me to be?"

Harry stared at him.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," said Harry coolly, "but if you think I'm going to just sit here and let you control my life, you've got another thing coming."

With that Harry stormed out of the room and slammed the door shut behind him.

_  
xxx_

The tears came about a minute after Harry had left. Brushing them away, Severus grabbed his already-packed bags and left. He knew that Harry wouldn't love him forever. What had he been thinking getting into this relationship? It had been wonderful at the beginning, but things changed. As much as he still loved Harry, Severus knew that it would be stupid of him to stay.

_  
xxx  
_

That night when he came home to find all of Severus's belongings gone, Harry was in shock. He hadn't really expected Severus to leave. He had thought that Severus would stay with him no matter what. A strange feeling settled in Harry's chest. Slowly, he walked over to the bedroom. Then he curled up on Severus's side of the bed and cried himself to sleep.

**Yes, I know this is rather sad. I've never written a story where Harry's been the piece of shit before. I thought this was different. Please review and tell me what you think!**


	18. Rain

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Fluff

**Warnings**: implied sexual content

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: After the war, Harry isn't sure whether he truly loves Severus or simply needs someone to hold.

**Song**: Rain

**Artist**: Breaking Benjamin

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) breakingbenjamin (slash) rain (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx   
_

It finally happened. Harry Potter had defeated Voldemort. But now that he had finally fulfilled his destiny, Harry didn't know what to do. He wanted to leave, that much he knew. He wanted to leave and get away from the millions of fans that were sure to be stalking him soon.

_  
xxx   
_

In the days that followed, Harry found himself getting more and more exhausted. Before, Ron and Hermione would have been there to make sure the had fun and got enough rest. Now they were dead, and the only remaining members of the Weasley family (Mrs. Weasley and Ginny) had decided to leave. Harry had no family left. That more than anything pushed him to leave.

_  
xxx   
_

To say that Harry was shocked when he ran into Severus Snape in a Muggle bar was an understatement. The two shared a few drinks and got to talking. They talked about the war and how lonely they were. A combination of said loneliness and large amounts of alcohol pushed Harry to accompany Severus back to his house afterward.

_  
xxx   
_

After that night, Harry and Severus started to see more of each other. Harry could see that Severus was getting more and more attached to him, but he wasn't completely sure that he really wanted Severus. Yes, Harry was happy when he was around Severus, but he wasn't sure if that was because he really loved Severus or if he just needed someone to be around. He decided that leaving would help him figure out. And while Severus wasn't pleased with his decision at first, he understood.

_  
xxx   
_

Over the next few months, Harry dated numerous people. They were all attractive and great in bed. But none of them made him feel the way that Severus did. After having been gone for about three months, Harry decided he had had enough. It was time to go home.

_  
xxx   
_

Harry's fear that Severus would have found someone else while he was gone was quickly displaced when he saw the smile on Severus's face as soon as he opened the door.

"I love you," Harry said.

Severus smiled and pulled Harry inside. Then he replied, "I love you, too. Welcome home."

_  
xxx   
_

That night Severus fell asleep with his arms around Harry. As Harry heard Severus's deep, even breathing, he smiled. He now knew what all the others were missing. None of them made him feel safe and loved. Severus did. Harry smiled and snuggled closer to Severus. __


	19. Straightjacket Feeling

**Rating**: R

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: OOC-ness, abuse (not from Severus), adult language

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Severus helps Harry recover from an abusive relationship.

**Song**: Straightjacket Feeling

**Artist**: the All-American Rejects

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) plyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) allamericanrejects (slash) straitjacketfeeling (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

When he felt something hit him in the face, Severus immediately woke up. He looked around to see Harry thrashing about in the bed. He was whimpering and muttering, "Please, don't hurt me."

Severus sighed. This was the third time this week Harry had dreamt about his past relationship. Not for the first time, Severus wished he could find this Ryan Bush guy and torture him. But no, the one time he suggested it Harry had protested vehemently, begging Severus to leave his ex-"boyfriend" alone. Although Severus disagreed, he followed his love's wishes. Now Severus reached out to try and wake Harry up.

_xxx  
_

"Look at the world's savoir now," taunted Ryan as he struck the whip against Harry's bare back. "Not so much of a hero now, are you?"

"Please, don't hurt me," Harry begged.

"**Harry."**

"You're lucky you have me," continued Ryan as he struck Harry again.

"Please," whimpered Harry.

"**Harry!"**

"Who the hell else would love you?" jeered Ryan. "You're nothing but a fucking waste of air space."

"**Harry!"**

Harry sat up in bed, crying and shaking. He looked over to see who had been shaking him and immediately met the concerned eyes of one Severus Snape. Harry lowered his head to his hands.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, ashamed for having woken up Severus for the third time that week.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about," soothed Severus as he gathered Harry gently into his arms. "Maybe you would feel better if you talked about it."

_  
xxx  
_

Harry wiped his eyes on his sleeve and leaned back. He was still in Severus's strong embrace, but now he didn't feel quite so helpless. He had never really told Severus about his past relationship before. Sure, Severus could guess from the cuts and bruises that littered Harry's body, but they had never really talked about it. Taking a deep breath, Harry started to talk.

"He wasn't so bad at first. He was kind. He would call me all the time, and always tell me how much I meant to him. He wanted to know where I was at all times, which I thought was sweet at first. But then he'd get mad when I would spend time with Ron and Hermione instead of him. If I wasn't home when he came over, he'd get furious. That's when the abuse started."

_  
xxx  
_

"The first time he hit me I left. I told myself I wouldn't get into an abusive relationship. But then he came back later that day, and he looked so sad. He begged me to forgive him, that he would never hit me again. I believed him, and I went home with him. He didn't hit me again for the longest time. We moved in together.

"Then it started getting worse. He hit me more and more. I left a few times, went over to Ron's. Ryan would always come back in tears, begging me to forgive him. I did it again. I went back to him every time."

_  
xxx  
_

"Why?" asked Severus gently, trying to understand his young love better. "Why would you go back to him? There are so many better people in the world."

"I was afraid that no one else would ever love me," whispered Harry brokenly. "I was nothing without him."

_xxx  
_

Severus wrapped his arms more tightly around Harry. He pressed many kisses to the top of Harry's head.

"I love you more than anything else in the world," Severus told him. "I will always be there for you, and I promise that I will never hurt you."

Harry leaned back enough to look Severus in the eyes. Harry smiled through his tears. "I know. I love you, too."

_  
xxx_

Time went on. They didn't speak of Ryan again for months. Slowly, all of the bad memories of Ryan were being replaced with the good memories of Severus. Harry's nightmares eventually stopped coming, and the two were settling down nicely.

Until they saw Ryan.

_  
xxx  
_

They were in Diagon Alley buying potions supplies for Severus when they saw him. Ryan made his way over to Harry and Severus. Harry tried to turn away, but Ryan grabbed a hold of his arm and pulled Harry close.

"Harry, I'm so sorry! I never meant to hurt you. I've been looking for you for months," cried Ryan, kneeling down in front of Harry, tears immediately filling his eyes.

Severus saw Harry begin to shake and knew that it was time to take action.

"Festinatio," he shouted, his wand pointed directly at Ryan.

_xxx_

Ryan screamed as he was thrown backward into the nearest wall. People all around stopped to stare. Severus ignored them. Instead, he walked slowly over to where Ryan was struggling to stand up. Severus grabbed Ryan's throat and slammed him back into the wall.

"Listen, and listen well because I'm only going to say this once," whispered Severus in his most dangerous voice. "The only reason that I am even allowing you to live is that Harry made me promise not to hurt you. If it were up to me, I would torture you until you were begging for death, and then I would slowly, while you were still alive, cut your insides out to use in potions. You should be extremely grateful that Harry is such a kind and caring person, because I can assure you that I am not. If you ever, and I mean ever, say another word to that young man, I will personally see to it that you are destroyed."

With that Severus turned and Apparated himself and Harry home and held his young love while he cried.


	20. Too Little Too Late

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Angst

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: All during the war, Harry tries to start a relationship with Severus. Now that the war's over and Voldemort is dead, Severus wants a relationship.

**Song**: Too Little Too Late

**Artist**: Hoobastank

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) hoobastank (slash) toolittletoolate (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

Harry was finally free. Having spent months training, he was well-prepared when Voldemort decided to make his annual visit to Hogwarts. The battle was long and difficult, but Harry finally did what he was destined to do. He defeated Lord Voldemort. For the first week or so everyone was all over him. But with the help of the Weasleys and Hermione, he was able to dodge most of the reporters. He rented his own little apartment near the village of Hogsmeade, and was quite happy spending some time to himself. This was the first time in his life when he felt he was truly free to do whatever he wanted to do.

One day as Harry was relaxing in his living room, he heard a knock on the door. Setting down his drink, he walked over and answered it. Severus Snape was standing on the other side.

_  
xxx_

Harry didn't bother trying to hide his shock at seeing his former lover on his doorstep. Severus had broken up with him months before, claiming that Harry was far too immature to be in an actual relationship with. Though Harry had been extremely hurt at the time, he had grown to accept the fact and move on. So Harry was very surprised to see the man here now. He hadn't spoken more than five words to Harry since he had kicked Harry out of his life.

_  
xxx_

"What do you want?" asked Harry. There was no bitterness, yet there was no warmth either. His voice seemed to hold no emotion whatsoever.

"I think that we should get back together," said Severus.

"What?" asked Harry incredulously. "Why?"

"Because, I think that we would make an excellent pair," said Severus. "You're famous; everybody loves you. With your help, I can quickly gain recognition and get my reputation back again. Plus, you'll get to be with me. We both win."

Harry stared at Severus in absolute shock.

_  
xxx_

"Go to hell," sneered Harry, moving to slam the door shut. Severus quickly intervened and positioned his foot in the way so that Harry couldn't shut the door.

"Move," snarled Harry.

"I don't understand what the problem is," reasoned Severus. "You want to be with me; I want my reputation back. It's the best of both worlds. I don't understand what the problem is."

"The problem," spat Harry angrily, "is that for months all I wanted was someone to be there for me, someone to take care of me. I was scared and all alone. Where the hell were you then? You think that you can just show up months later and everything will be all better? I don't think so! I've moved on. I don't care about you anymore. I'm going to find someone who doesn't think that I'm immature, someone who thinks that I am worthy of love, someone who won't just use me to get their bloody reputation back!"

"But—" sputtered Severus.

"Fuck you!" Harry slammed the door in Severus's face.

_  
xxx_

_  
_Severus stood staring at Harry's door, a look of shock on his face. Harry had wanted to be with him for so long, and had looked so devastated when Severus had broken off their relationship, that Severus had been sure that Harry would welcome him back. Clearly he was wrong. As Severus turned to walk away from the door, he wondered if maybe Harry was a lot stronger than he had given the boy credit for.

**A/n: Okay, this isn't all that great. I just realized that I've written so many stories where Severus is an ass and Harry just welcomes him back, so I figured I needed to write one where Severus doesn't get another chance. **


	21. Unaffected

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings: **n/a

**Spoilers: **n/a

**Summary: **Harry's in love with Severus, but the wizarding world doesn't approve. What will they do?

**Song: **Unaffected

**Artist: **Hoobastank

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) hoobastank (slash) unaffected (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

Since Voldemort was dead, Harry figured it would be a safe time for him and Severus to come as a couple.

WRONG

Everyone seemed to start freaking out. They didn't like their savior dating a Death Eater. No matter what he said, no one seemed to believe that Harry would actually want to be with Severus. The Daily Prophet was constantly filled with articles saying that Harry was losing his mind.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus could tell that Harry was trying to pretend that he wasn't bothered by the articles. It hurt Severus to see Harry in such distress.

"I don't see why you worry so much about what they think," he commented one morning over breakfast.

"I don't see why you're not upset about this," argued Harry.

"Because I knew the moment we started this relationship that not many people would support us," said Severus gently. "You love me. I love you. That's all that matters."

Though he was deeply touched by what Severus had said, Harry couldn't bring himself to think the same. They were insulting the love of his life. How was he supposed to pretend that that didn't matter?

_  
xxx   
_

Harry was in Hogsmeade one day buying ingredients for Severus when he overheard two witches talking. They seemed to think that Harry was turning to the Dark Side. Furious, Harry slammed down the ingredients and left without buying anything. He hurried home to talk to Severus.

_  
xxx  
_

"They think I'm turning to the Dark Side!" ranted Harry. Severus was sitting down at the table calmly drinking some tea while Harry paced back and forth across the room.

"I mean, seriously, what sense does that make?" Harry insisted. "If I wanted to be all dark and stuff I would have taken over the Death Eaters, not date one!"

Severus raised an eyebrow.

"Not that I think you're a Death Eater," Harry hurried to correct himself. "But in their minds you are one, so I just don't understand their reasoning."

_  
xxx  
_

Harry stopped pacing for a moment to look down at Severus.

"Why aren't you upset?"

"Harry, we've gone over this before. There is never going to be a time when everyone supports us. You're their savior. You're good and pure and beautiful, while I'm evil and tainted and ugly. That's just the way the world works. You should learn to just accept that fact and move on."

_  
xxx  
_

"I can't 'just accept that fact and move on,'" argued Harry. "I love you more than anything else in this world and no one supports us. Not only do they not support us, they're violently against us!"

"Violently?" asked Severus. Harry frowned.

"Severus, I've seen some of the hate mail you've received. You can't tell me that none of that is violent."

"Well, then what do you say we move somewhere else?" asked Severus. "Somewhere that no one knows who either of us is?"

"We could do that?" asked Harry, shocked. Hogwarts was Sev's home. Hell, it was Harry's home, too. Severus would move simply to make Harry happy?

"Yes, move. We could move to America. They might recognize you, but you wouldn't have nearly the same popularity over there as they didn't have to worry about the Dark Lord any. What do you say?"

"When can we move?"

_  
xxx_

Harry curled up around his husband and snuggled close. He loved this man so much, this man who had given up his home and everything he knew so that Harry would be more comfortable. Truth be told, Harry knew that this move was good for Severus as well. Besides, here they could officially get married. (They moved to Massachusetts.) Most of the people around them seemed to accept them, and if they didn't it was because they were gay, and not because Severus was a Death Eater. Harry loved it here, but he loved Severus even more.

"I love you," Harry whispered.

"I love you, too, brat," replied Severus. "Now stop your incessant babbling and let me get some sleep."

Harry just laughed and snuggled closer to the man he loved.


	22. Violins

**Rating: PG-13 **

**Genres: Romance, Angst**

**Warnings: n/a**

**Spoilers: n/a**

**Summary: Harry confesses his love for Severus. Severus doesn't feel the same way. **

**Song: Violins**

**Artist: Yellowcard (originally by Lagwagon)**

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) yellowcard (slash) violins (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

Harry Potter and Severus Snape had been in a relationship for almost a year now. Though they started out having a purely physical relationship, Harry couldn't help but fall in love with the older man. After all that time together, Harry assumed that Severus loved him as well. After a night of passionate love-making, Harry made what he would come to consider the biggest mistake of his life. He told Severus that he loved him.

_  
xxx  
_

Severus just laughed in his face. He told Harry that while they had some great sex, he wasn't interested in a relationship. Severus asked Harry why he thought anyone would want to be in a real relationship with him when he served his purpose in life simply by being such a great fuck toy. Harry hadn't been able to take anything else after that. He ran from the house and into the nearest bar. There was no way he was going to deal with his broken heart sober.

_  
xxx  
_

The next morning Harry woke up with a splitting headache. Empty bottles littered the floor, and Harry could hear someone else's deep snores. Severus never snored. It took Harry a moment to figure out where he was since he was sure he wasn't at Severus's house. Harry looked around and spotted a blond head sticking out of the covers. Groaning, Harry rolled out of bed, gathered his clothes, and went back to his house. The man didn't say anything when he saw Harry leave. Maybe Severus was right. Maybe Harry was only good for sex.

_  
xxx_

The more Harry thought about it, the more he realized that he couldn't just take Severus's words at face value. The man had been a Death Eater, after all. He was used to hiding his feelings. Harry just couldn't believe that after a year of being with the man, Severus would simply cast him aside. The man had to feel something for him, didn't he?

_  
xxx  
_

Halfway home, Harry changed his course and walked to Severus's house instead. He walked up the stairs and knocked on the door. Shuffling was heard from inside before the door opened, revealing a well-rested Severus.

"I don't believe that you don't love me," said Harry before the older man could get any words out.

_  
xxx_

"I assure you that I don't love you," Severus said, looking bored and a slight bit irritated. "I do not fall in love. If you cannot tell the difference between love and lust, then I have nothing more to say to you. Goodbye."

And with that Severus shut the door in Harry's face. __

xxx

When he heard the slam, Harry winced and dropped his eyes. Those eyes immediately started to fill with tears. Severus really didn't love him. Wiping his hand over his eyes and trying to ignore the trembling of his lower lip, Harry turned and walked away from the door broken-hearted.

**I know, not very happy. Sorry, but this was the only song I could find that started with the letter "V," and I thought the story needed a bit more variety.**


	23. World You Love

**Rating: R**

**Genres: Romance, Angst, Fluff**

**Warnings: character death (NOT Harry or Sev)**

**Spoilers: 1-5**

**Summary:** **Every war needs a hero: someone that the people can look up to. They're supposed to be strong, courageous, and cheerful. They're supposed to raise people's spirits. But heroes need someone, too.**

**Song: World You Love, The **

**Artist: Jimmy Eat World**

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) azlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) jimmyeatworld (slash) theworldyoulove (dot) html

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

Harry saw the headline of the Daily Prophet and nearly gagged on his breakfast. Three more children had been killed in werewolf attacks. Another one was taken to the hospital with severe bites. Harry pushed his breakfast to the side; there was no way that he could eat after that. Ignoring the accusing stares of seemingly everyone else in the room, Harry got up and left the Great Hall. On his way out he met Severus's eyes. Harry gave him a small smile that didn't quite reached his eyes and left.

_xxx_

Harry was tired. Tired of the fighting. Tired of everyone looking to him for help when all he wanted to do was curl up in a ball and cry. Why did he have to be the strong one? Why couldn't anyone else do it? 

_xxx_

That night found Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Severus sitting around the Potions Master's quarters. They didn't talk about the attacks, or Voldemort, or the Ministry. Ron and Hermione fell asleep on the sofa. Hermione's head was resting on Ron's shoulder, and he had his arm draped over her protectively. Severus followed Harry's gaze and smiled down at his young lover. Then he pulled Harry closer to him and kissed the top of his head. Harry snuggled closer to Severus. It was times like these that Harry felt the most safe.

_xxx_

As Harry lay in Severus's arms, he thought about Quidditch. The sport had been so much fun in the beginning, something that he could do without really thinking. But that was before Voldemort. Now that Voldemort was back, things Harry once thought of as fun no longer held any pleasure. He could no longer enjoy flying on a broom because at that very moment, someone could be dying.

_xxx  
_

Severus could practically hear Harry's thoughts and frowned. He hated when Harry got depressed. Silently he cursed the wizarding population for placing too much weight on Harry's shoulders. The young man had only recently turned seventeen. He shouldn't be responsible for saving the world.

_xxx_

Harry felt Severus's arms tighten around him and smiled. He knew that Severus knew exactly what he was thinking. Leaning up and pressing a chaste kiss to Severus's lips, Harry thought about his relationship with Severus. After months of secretly watching each other, the two had finally been pushed together by Ron and Hermione. The couple had literally pushed Harry and Severus into a closet and told them that they wouldn't be let out until they confessed their feelings for each other. Three hours later the couple emerged, smiles on both their faces. Ever since that day, Severus was always there for Harry. And while Harry felt weak having to ask the man for so much help, he knew that Severus didn't consider him weak. And that made all the difference in the world.

_xxx  
_

Over the next few weeks, Harry smiled as much as he could. He didn't want people to say that he was depressed. That might lead people to thinking that he wasn't fit for the war against Voldemort. And then he would have all those people hounding him to get with the program; he still had a war to win. No, it was better that everyone think that Harry was happy and healthy and able to defeat Voldemort. So Harry kept smiling. Severus was one of the few people who saw through that smile.

_xxx  
_

The final battle came before Harry was completely ready. The Death Eaters attacked first, and many students were killed in the battle. Harry didn't pay them any attention. He couldn't think about them, because he knew that if he did he would fall apart. Instead, he focused all his energy on killing Voldemort.

Soon, though, his thoughts were focused elsewhere. Voldemort had gotten a hold of Severus. Harry became furious as he watched his love be tortured. Harry attacked. Voldemort wasn't surprised. He had been waiting for Harry to show up. As they fought, Harry caught a glimpse of Severus, who was lying on the ground, bloody and bruised and wheezing. That only fueled Harry's ire, and he fought Voldemort more aggressively.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the dark wizard fell. Harry, weak from the fight, collapsed on the ground next to Severus. He crawled over so he could inspect Severus. The older man was still breathing, but very slightly. Using the last of his strength, Harry managed to stand up and levitate Severus to the hospital wing. Then he collapsed on the floor.

_xxx_

Someone was holding Harry's hand when he woke up. Opening his eyes slowly, Harry found himself looking into Severus's eyes.

"Severus!" Harry exclaimed, throwing his arms around the older man. "Oh, I'm so glad that you're all right! I was so worried that something had happened to you."

"I'm fine," said Severus. His tone made Harry lean back a little. Frowning, Harry searched Severus's eyes, trying to determine what had happened.

"What's wrong?" he asked fearfully. Severus hesitated, then finally answered.

"Your friends didn't make it," he answered softly.

Harry didn't know what to say. The euphoria he had felt after seeing Severus left as quickly as it had come. He felt numb. His eyes started to fill with tears, and he didn't even attempt to brush them aside. He felt Severus climb onto the bed and pull Harry closer. Harry let the older man rub his back. It was a small comfort, but it was still there.

**Sorry about this one. This is one of the ones that I love the song, but I don't really like the songfic. I was going to have Severus die in the battle and have Harry have to carry on like nothing's wrong, as I think it fits the song better, but I know that people prefer happy endings, so I didn't. Not that this is happy, but Sev's still alive, so I figured this was better than one where he died. **

**Please review and let me know if you agree or not. **


	24. Xhilarating Sadness

**Rating: **PG-13

**Genres: **Romance, Angst

**Warnings: **N/A

**Spoilers: **N/A

**Summary: **After the war, Severus watches as Harry slips away.

**Disclaimer: **Harry Potter and Co. belong to JK Rowling. Song and lyrics belong to the artist and/or songwriter. I am making no money off of this and do not mean to defile the song/characters in anyway.

**Song: **X-hilarating Sadness

**Artist: **Saw Doctors

**Note: **Alright, so I sort of cheated. The song is called "Exhilarating Sadness," but I really liked the lyrics for this song, and I couldn't find a good song that started with "X," so this will have to do.

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) lyricsplanet (dot)com (slash) index (dot)php3?stylelyrics&id12617

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx _

Severus Snape was surprised to see Harry Potter at the bar that day. Most people were out celebrating Voldemort's downfall with their friends and family. Suddenly Severus realized why Harry was there. All of his friends, the people he had come to think of as his family, were dead. None of them survived the war. Severus knew why Harry didn't feel like celebrating. Hell, he didn't feel like celebrating, and he hadn't lost anyone to begin with. Severus watched as Harry ordered himself shot after shot of some unknown beverage. Severus knew that Harry was trying to forget, and he couldn't blame him. If he were Harry, he wouldn't want to remember, either.

_  
xxx   
_

Ever since that first day in the bar, Severus took to watching Harry. The partying never seemed to stop, and Harry never seemed to go anywhere else. One night the Weird Sisters decided to hold a free concert. The music was blaring, and everyone was singing and dancing and having a great time. Everyone except for Harry. Harry sat in his own little corner, staring off into space. He didn't seem to care what was going on with the rest of the world. The rest of the world, however, seemed to care what was going on with Harry. Severus watched angrily as people stopped what they were doing to shoot Harry curious glances. They whispered about how Harry had finally lost his mind. He was finally broken. Harry didn't hear the whispers, but Severus did. And each time he heard someone say something like that about Harry, the more determined Severus was to prove to them that Harry was not broken.

_  
xxx   
_

There were a few times when some of the bar's occupants tried to get Harry to join them. The girls begged Harry to dance with them. The boys offered to buy Harry drinks. Harry always shook his head. Most of the people walked away looking rather put off. But one night a man wouldn't take no for an answer. Angered by Harry's lack of response, the man moved to draw his wand. Severus was before Harry in an instant, warning the man not to so much as think of jinxing Harry unless he wanted to find himself tied to a fence in the middle of town buck naked with his ass in the air. The man walked away fuming. Harry shot Severus a small, appreciative smile. Severus was captivated, not by the smile, but by the look of extreme sadness radiating from Harry's eyes. Severus vowed to try to make Harry happy.

_  
xxx _

Seven years had passed since that night in the bar. Severus had slowly begun to join Harry at his little table in the corner of the bar. Harry eventually started talking to Severus, though not about anything important. He never brought up the war, and Severus knew better than to try. He joked with Harry about trivial things and was pleased to see a light of happiness in Harry's eyes that he hadn't seen since before Voldemort fell.

Harry and Severus had slowly entered a relationship. Severus was careful not to rush Harry for fear of breaking him even more. Some nights Harry woke up crying and screaming, another nightmare shaking all thoughts of sleep from his head. During those nights Severus would hold Harry and gently rock the boy to sleep. Somehow, during their time together, Severus had grown to love Harry. He couldn't pin-point the exact date, but somehow he found that his feelings of concern and protectiveness had blossomed into love. And though neither ever spoke of their feelings aloud, Severus knew that Harry loved him as well. Harry also knew that Severus loved him. The gentle caresses and the way Severus was always so careful and protective around him gave it away, as did the small smiles and cuddles Harry always shared with Severus.

Harry no longer spent all his time in bars. His time instead was spent curled up around Severus. Severus was overjoyed whenever he managed to make Harry laugh, and he was even pleased to see Harry cry. Crying was a way to deal with the painful memories and move on. Severus knew this, and thus knew how to comfort Harry whenever needed. Harry was still the same shy, quiet young man he had been at the end of the war, but Severus knew that Harry wasn't as depressed. He was improving slowly but surely.

Severus smiled as he looked down at the man he loved. Yes, he thought, I will do everything in my power to make Harry as happy as possible.

And he did.

**A/N: Please tell me what you think. This wasn't how I had planned this, but this is how it turned out. I didn't quite know how to end it. I hope it wasn't too bad. **


	25. You Don't See Me

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: n/a

**Spoilers**: n/a

**Summary**: Harry's in love with Severus, but Severus would never love Harry. Right?

**Song**: You Don't See Me

**Artist**: Josie and the Pussycats Soundtrack

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Song lyrics can be found here: www (dot) stlyrics (dot)com (slash) lyrics (slash) josieandthepussycats (slash) youdontseeme (dot) htm

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx  
_

Harry and Severus spent the last seven months of Harry's seventh year training for the final battle. The two of them became good friends, and Severus was always there to help Harry. Two months after graduation, Harry defeated Voldemort.

_  
xxx  
_

The Ministry decided to hold a huge ball to celebrate Voldemort's downfall. Harry didn't want to go, but he knew that the press would be worse if he didn't. Harry felt his breath catch when he saw Severus. The man was absolutely beautiful. Harry knew that he didn't have a chance, and tried to talk to Severus as if everything was normal. If Severus noticed that something was off, then he didn't say anything.

_  
xxx   
_

Later that night as he was getting a drink, Harry saw Severus laughing with Draco Malfoy. There seemed to be some familiarity between them, like they hung out a lot. Maybe they were dating, Harry mused. Deciding that no one would miss him and not really caring if they did, Harry fled the ball and went home.

_  
xxx  
_

That night Harry dreamt of black eyes and passionate sex. It was beautiful. Then he woke up. Realizing that it was only a dream, Harry started to cry.

_  
xxx  
_

The next morning Harry saw Severus and Draco talking. Severus invited him into the conversation. Harry tried to laugh with them, but it was painful to watch Severus and Draco joking together. Harry mentally scolded himself. He should be happy that Severus was happy. Besides, he could settle for just being Severus's friend. Right? Sighing, Harry excused himself and went back to his rooms.

_  
xxx_

Severus frowned as Harry left. The young man who had stolen Severus's heart looked so depressed lately, and he couldn't for the life of him figure out why. He decided to ask Draco. Maybe he would be able to figure out what was wrong with Harry.

"Are you blind?" Draco asked by means of answering Severus. "He's clearly in love with you."

_  
xxx  
_

Severus stared at Draco in shock. Rolling his eyes, Draco explained.

"Anyone with eyes can tell that he's in love with you. You should see the way he stares at you when you're not looking. He definitely loves you."

"But why hasn't he said anything to me?" asked Severus.

Draco sighed in exasperation. "He's insecure. He thinks you're too good for him. Jesus, Severus, you're the one who supposedly loves him, and you don't even know that? If you really want a relationship with Harry, and I know you do, you're going to have to be the one who starts it. There's no way that Harry's going to. And I'd do it soon if I were you," Draco added. "If you don't hurry someone else will."

_  
xxx  
_

Meanwhile, Harry was in his rooms crying. It seemed to him like he was the only one who didn't have someone to love him. Ron had Hermione. Neville had Luna. Ginny had Dean. Severus had Draco. Harry sobbed again. He was sobbing to hard he almost didn't hear the knock at the door. Wiping his eyes, Harry got up and opened the door. He was shocked to see Severus standing on the other side.

_  
xxx_

"W-what do you want?" asked Harry, trying to keep his voice from wavering.

Instead of answering, Severus bent down and kissed Harry full on the lips. He heard Harry gasp and plunged his tongue into Harry's mouth, tasting everything he could. This felt so good. Harry's head was spinning. Kissing Severus was even better than he had hoped. He felt his knees shake and threaten to give out, so he pulled away, breathing heavily.

Severus looked down at Harry's flushed face and noticed that his whole body seemed to be trembling. Severus smiled and rubbed his thumb gently over Harry's cheek.

"I love you," he said, looking straight into Harry's eyes.

Harry looked up at Severus, speechless once again. Severus loved him? How was that possible? Severus was so beautiful...

"Why?" Harry asked, trying to understand what was being told to him. Severus chuckled.

"Because you are the most beautiful, caring, giving individual that I have ever known," Severus told him sincerely. "I wanted to tell you before, but I was afraid."

"What would you have to be afraid of?" Harry asked.

"I was afraid that you wouldn't want me," admitted Severus. He saw the shock on Harry's face and kissed him again.

"I love you," Severus said again. "Will you give me a chance to prove it to you?"

Slowly, hardly daring to hope, Harry nodded. Then he whispered, "I love you, too."

Severus smiled down at Harry and started to kiss him again, more passionately this time than before. Harry had to hold on to him to keep from falling.


	26. Zero

**Rating**: PG-13

**Genres**: Romance, Angst, Fluff

**Warnings**: OOC-ness

**Spoilers**: 1-6

**Summary**: Harry tries to tell Severus to ignore everyone's hurtful comments. But what happens when Harry doesn't follow his own advice?

**Song**: Zero

**Artist**: Darren Hayes

**Thanks to EmeraldEyes121 for suggesting this song. **

**Author's Note: **Originally a songfic, the lyrics have been removed from this fic to comply with FF rules. Sadly, I have been unable to locate the lyrics to this song. If anyone wants them, email me. I have the lyrics, but not a link.

For the original version of this fic, please check out my livejournal:

www (dot) livejournal (dot) com (slash) users (slash) Harry (underscore) sev (slash)

_xxx_

Harry Potter had been in love with Severus Snape since before the war ended. After learning that Severus hadn't really wanted to kill Dumbledore, Harry began to respect the older man. His feelings of respect had somehow turned to love, and Harry had been terrified that Severus would discover Harry's feelings and no longer wish to be friends.

So to say that Harry was ecstatic to learn that Severus returned his feelings was an understatement. After recovering from the initial shock, Harry had been overwhelmed with happiness. The man he loved loved him back. What could go wrong?

_xxx_

Harry quickly found that people weren't nearly as forgiving as he thought. He had thought that once the war was over and Harry had released evidence that Severus was really innocent, people would accept the erstwhile Death Eater. Clearly he was wrong. No one seemed to believe Harry when he told them that Severus was innocent. They thought that Harry was out of his mind, that Severus had somehow cursed Harry into loving him. Harry could see that this was affecting Severus, and he was determined to make it stop.

_xxx_

Severus seemed more distant now that they had come out as a couple. Harry knew that it was because of the increased publicity, and he felt guilty for causing it. If Harry had been someone, anyone, else, the two could have run off together, somewhere that no one would know who they were. But since Harry was famous, no matter where they went, everyone knew who he was, and would probably know who they thought Severus was as well.

Sighing, Harry wrapped his arms around Severus. Severus tensed for a moment, then relaxed into Harry's embrace. Harry kissed the back of his neck and whispered, "You are the kindest, bravest, strongest person I have ever met. Don't listen to anything that those people say. Hold your head up high, and show them that you're better than they are."

_xxx_

Severus did his best to do as Harry said. He never commented on anything that people said to him or about him. Instead, he tried to focus on the good things in life. He noticed the way everyone seemed much calmer now that the war was over. And while most people still distrusted him, some seemed to have moved on. Harry's friends trusted Harry, and since Harry trusted Severus, so did they. Their approval meant a lot to him, even if he would never admit it aloud.

_xxx_

One day Harry and Severus went to Diagon Alley. Severus had to buy potions supplies, and they decided to spend the day shopping together. The apothecary was the one place in Diagon Alley where Severus could go and not feel looked-down on. The owner of the apothecary was a little old woman who had known Severus for many years, who knew that Severus was a good person.

Unfortunately, there was a bar right down the street, and since the war was over, people were always celebrating. A small group of men had been leaving the bar when they spotted Harry and Severus enter the apothecary. The leader of the group, a man whose daughter had been tortured by Death Eaters for almost an hour before the Aurors showed up, frowned and started to stagger toward the store. His buddies followed him.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" he sneered once inside the store. "Is old Snapey picking up potions ingredients? What's he making, I wonder. Some new poison to torture small children with, perhaps?"

Severus was about to respond when Harry leapt at the man. Harry started beating him repeatedly, his wand seemingly forgotten. Severus stood in shock for a moment before coming to his senses and pulling Harry off of the man. Harry fought against him but Severus held him tightly, preventing him from continuing. Severus gave his apologies to the owner and Apparated Harry back home.

_xxx_

Severus didn't let go of Harry until they were safely back home. Harry was still shaking from anger, though he seemed to be calming down a lot. Severus looked at Harry with a mixture of pride and shock.

"Well?" he snapped when Harry didn't say anything.

"Well what?" returned Harry, sounding slightly upset with Severus.

"What the hell was that?" Severus asked.

"He was saying that you were going to torture children," Harry pointed out. "I'm sick to death of people saying shit like that about you. I couldn't take it anymore."

"What happened to holding your head up high and showing everyone that you're better than that?" Severus asked, using Harry's own words against him.

_xxx_

Harry blushed a little, all anger seeming to evaporate, leaving Harry drained.

"I just couldn't take it anymore," Harry said quietly, his head bowed. "Everyone always says such terrible things about you. I couldn't stand hearing all of those people insult the man I love."

_xxx_

Severus smiled and pulled Harry close. The two had never admitted their love for each other aloud before, and Severus could tell that Harry was bracing himself for rejection. Severus kissed the top of Harry's head as Harry leaned into him.

"The only thing that matters to me is that the man I love believes that I'm innocent," said Severus. "And you do believe me. I don't need anyone else's approval or support but yours."

Harry smiled and kissed Severus. When they pulled apart Harry said, "You're forgetting one thing, though."

"What's that?" asked Severus, glad to see a playful smirk back on Harry's face.

"I said that you were better than that. I never said that I was."

Severus pushed Harry back against the seat of the couch and kissed him again.

"No you didn't," agreed Severus. "I did."

THE END!

(finally)

**A/n: Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed! I'm sorry if this last chapter wasn't the greatest. I'm just glad I found a Z song. (thanks again EmeraldEyes121!)**


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